Every year, surrogate mothers keep on increasing across the world and surrogacy keep on bringing up children lacking a gestational or/and genetic link existing between them and their mothers. Ever since the first birth in the year 1983 when a woman conceived through a donated egg, it made it possible for many women to become pregnant with children who are directly unrelated genetic wise (Golombok et al., 2011). Despite this, there are a number of Maternal-fetal attachments in surrogate mothers which may impact their relationship with the infants. Normally the children who are born from surrogacy always lack a link between them and their biological mothers compared to the surrogate mothers. Considering the fact the surrogate mother usually carry the surrogate baby to term and deliver them normally, the link between her and the baby is bound to be greater compared to that with the mother who gave her ovum (Hong & Park, 2012).
According to the studies conducted in the 1970s, researchers studied the maternal-infant attachment which was evident moments later, after the birth of the child; this attachment was referred to as bonding (Smith, 1998). With the bonding comes emotions which grow with the pregnancy (Loop, 2017). A confusion usually arises the moment the surrogate mother starts thinking that at some point she will have to give the baby away to another woman, which may even result to anger or sadness (Loop, 2017). Developmental changes are mostly experienced during the pregnancy periods mostly in relation to the mothers as well as the infants’ emotional and physical changes. This period is referred to as the sensitive period, a time when the attachment between the fetus and the mother blossoms (Smith, 1998). During the gestation period, the bond between the infant and the maternal mother increases, thus becoming attached emotionally to the growing baby inside her (Loop, 2017). Maternal fatal attachment is said to have the capability of increasing, especially after having a planned ultrasound, increased gestation, quickening, and pregnancy (Smith, 1998). The maternal bond between the maternal mother and the infant is automatic and thus naturally thus hard to inevitable.
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After birth, it is no doubt that the infant would need a lot of attention in addition to comfort specifically for their caregivers (Cherry, 2018). In most cases, the maternal mother may prove important when it comes to raising the baby thus leading to the rise of infant-caregiver attachment. A child usually becomes attached to a person when she or he becomes strongly disposed of seeking proximity to as well as contact with specific individuals. Doing this may be due to a specific situation which may be because of fright, illness or tired. A child’s and caregivers’ connection which is mostly emotional charged ensures that both the caregiver and the baby remain within physical closeness, especially at ages of 8 months and 18 months. The surrogate at this time may either be close or moved away after handing over the baby to the biological mother. Her presence at this point if constant the baby may end up attached more to her than the biological mother. In this case, the relation between the surrogate mother and the infant may affect that which exists between the baby and the biological mother. According to research, it was found that whenever the surrogate mother was around then the baby would explore and play comfortably and would become visibly upset the moment she left. All the same, others were found to have very little change the moment their maternal mothers left thus not distressed; this was referred to as avoidant attachment (Hong & Park, 2012). More so, a number of infants exhibited anxiety even with their mothers around. Whenever their mothers left, the babies would excessively protest and were never comforted the moment they returned. This pattern according to Ainsworth is referred to as ambivalent (resistant, anxious-ambivalent) attachment (Hong & Park, 2012).
In most cases, in order to block themselves for the children, the surrogate mothers had to deny themselves that they are the maternal mothers and completely detach themselves from the children. Surrogate mothers have a complete attachment to the children they carry for other couples simply because they grow in them, thus making them develop an emotional bond with the children. In order to detach themselves completely from the children, denial stands as the best option for the mothers (Smith, 1998).
The children who are born from surrogacy always lack a link between them and their biological mothers compared to the surrogate mothers. The surrogate mothers tend to have a certain relationship with the child, which boosts their relationship. The bond between the surrogate mothers and the infants grow after pregnancy starts to grow, thus creating an emotional bond as well between the surrogate mother and the infants. Maternal fatal attachment is said to have the capability of increasing, especially after having a planned ultrasound, increased gestation, quickening, and pregnancy. After birth, it is no doubt that the infant would need a lot of attention in addition to comfort specifically for their caregivers thus become highly attached to those around including their maternal and biological mothers. Surrogate mothers tend to opt for denial in order to cut off their attachment with the child owing to the fact that the child is not theirs. All the same, the attachment between the child and the surrogate tend to be inevitable as it is automatic and natural.
References
Cherry, K. (2018, February 19). The Story of Bowlby, Ainsworth, and Attachment Theory. Very Well Mind . Retrieved from https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-attachment-theory-2795337
Golombok, S., Readings, J., Blake, L., Casey, P., Marks, A., & Jadva, V. (2011). Families created through surrogacy: Mother-child relationships and children’s psychological adjustment at age 7. Dev Psychol . 47(6): 1579–1588. DOI: 10.1037/a0025292
Hong, Y. R., & Park, J. S. (2012). Impact of attachment, temperament and parenting on human development. Korean Journal of Pediatrics 2012 Dec; 55(12): 449–454. DOI: 10.3345/kjp.2012.55.12.449
Loop, E. (2017, June 13). Emotional Issues for Surrogate Mothers & Families. Live Strong . Retrieved from https://www.livestrong.com/article/117026-problems-surrogate-mothers/
Smith, M. (1998). Professional Issues: Maternal-fetal attachment in surrogate mothers. British Journal of Midwifery , 6(3), 188-192.
