We have the right to be outraged when we are hurt, and it is perfectly human if one feels that they want to hurt back when they have been hurt. From my experience, hurting back the ones who hurt you rarely satisfies. Many times, we think that it does, but it doesn't. Retaliation only gives us a moment of recess from our pain. The only way that we can truly experience healing and peace is to forgive all those that wronged us and ask us to be forgiven in return to those that we have wronged. If we do not forgive, we remain locked up in our pain and locked out of the possibility of experiencing healing and freedom as well as locked out of the possibility of being at peace (Tutu & Tutu, 2014) .
To be able to forgive someone or asking for forgiveness is the most important aspect of an individual's spiritual growth. When you are able to say that "I am sorry" or "I have forgiven you." This is an emotion that is felt deep inside the person, and when real forgiveness takes place, change is experienced in the relationship. We live in a society that believes that revenge is the best option, and we also carry misconceptions' that are based on wounds from our childhood that many at times we are in conflict with our lives and in the serving of our highest purpose. Becoming aware of our misconceptions and how they influence our thinking and decision-making process is an important step for true spiritual growth.
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Robert Muller stated that "To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness (Gulla, 2010, pp65)."
Disagreements will always be there, and it is in our human nature that we feel the need to punish others for their wrongdoings, but according to the Bible, we ate not supposed to judge. Instead, we are asked to forgive in order to end the cycle of indifference as two wrongs do not make a right (Tutu & Tutu, 2014) . Muller was of the notion that we should understand the nature of our disagreements and move on with love. This can only happen when we have or develop an attitude of forgiveness. From Muller's quote, the only way that we can achieve deep internal peace when we do not get what we want from others is through forgiveness. Most of our suffering does not come from the outside but from within because we choose to remain in pain if someone does anything that is contrary to our beliefs or liking (Gulla, 2010) .
God gave us the ability to choose and make decisions, and therefore our inability to forgive or remain in pain is entirely ours. Fogginess is the only way that we can let go off the anger and look to the positive side of our relationship with the people who have wronged us (Tutu & Tutu, 2014) . We exist in a delicate network of interdependence and when we choose not to forgive, its not we alone that suffer but our families, friends, communities as well as the whole world. Therefore, the invitation to forgive is not an invitation to be abused; instead, it is an invitation to find real healing and peace.
Questions for the class: What is the relationship between love and forgiveness?
Question for my peers: Why should I forgive the person that has offended or hurt me?
References
Gulla, A. (2010). In Search of Happiness: Through Love, Positive Attitude, Good Relations, and Spirituality . AuthorHouse.
Tutu, D., & Tutu, M. (2014). Why We Forgive . Spirituality Health. Retrieved 27 February 2020, from https://spiritualityhealth.com/articles/2014/02/17/why-we-forgive.
