Social penetration theory is a communications theory about the development of relationships. As people get to know one another better, the relationships become more profound and engaging. It is also known as the stage theory because as a relationship develops, communication moves from shallow and non-intimate to deeper and intimate. Social penetration theory is evident in the animated film "Shrek 1". The relationship between Shrek and Fiona develops gradually until they fall in love. Although the film is a fairy tale, it provides exciting illustrations about human communications. Another relationship in the animated film that illustrates social penetration theory is one between Shrek and the donkey. Both these relationships develop as the characters her to know each other better.
The first stage of the social penetration there is the orientation phase. During this stage, there is little exchange of personal information, and the relationship can be described as shallow. Conventions and social norms govern communication during this stage. Additionally, communication is characterized by small talk. After meeting Shrek, donkey tells him that he does not have many friends. Their relationship at first is awkward because donkey makes insulting comments about Shrek, but he also attempts to make amends by using flattery unsuccessfully. Shrek is not interested in donkey's friendships and attempts to discourage him, but donkey does not take no for an answer. The interaction between Shrek and donkey during their meeting shows evidence of the orientation phase of social penetration theory. Orientation is also evident during Shrek's and Fiona's initial meeting. After rescuing Fiona from the dragon, Shrek shakes the princess to wake her up instead of kissing her as expected of a prince charming. Shrek did not kiss Fiona because he was hiding the fact that he is an ugly green ogre. The conversation between Shrek and the princess is limited during this stage.
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The second stage of the social penetration theory is the exploratory affective exchange. During this phase, communicators start revealing themselves slowly although deeply personal information is still withheld. It is during this stage that casual relationships develop, and most of them remain at this stage. As Shrek and donkey continue to interact, they begin to reveal limited information about themselves. Shrek claims that he does not like it when people bother him even after showing that he is not interested in them. Donkey's insistence exasperates him, and he accepts that it is the reason why donkey does not have friends. Fiona's and Shrek's relationship also develops into the exploratory stage. After rescuing the princess, the princess requests Shrek to remove his helmet to show himself. He refuses to remove his helmet because he is afraid that the princess will know that he is an ogre and may run away. Shrek uses the helmet to hide the secret that he is an ogre. Although he ends up removing the helmet, he is certain that the princess is not impressed by his looks.
The third stage of social penetration theory is the affective exchange stage. It is during this phase that people disclose private and personal matters. Communicators are comfortable during this phase to even argue and criticize one another. Additionally, it is the phase that romantic relationships develop. The breadth and depth of topics start to deepen. As Shrek and donkey start to know each other better, they become friends. Shrek begins to note that donkey has both good and bad qualities. He admits that he shuts people out because of the fear of being stereotyped. He continues to reveal that he is better alone because people judge him even before knowing who he is. On his part, donkey reassures him that he did not judge Shrek during their first meeting, but he liked him from that first instance. The relationship between Shrek and Fiona also enters this crucial stage of the social penetration theory. They keep arguing as they walk through the forest. At some point, Shrek compares himself to an onion because ogres and onions have layers. By comparing himself to an onion, Shrek meant that people tend to see the outside of a person and not the inside. He also overhears Fiona telling donkey that it was impossible to love an ugly beast, which was about herself and not Shrek. Donkey has seen Fiona turn into a hideous beast during sunset. It is also during this stage that the romantic relationship between Shrek and Fiona starts.
The last phases of the social penetration theory are the stable exchange stage. During this phase, communicators are comfortable to talk about everything. Communication is also rich, free and open across all levels of the relationship. It is also assumed that people start evaluating their relationships in a cost-benefit manner, which may lead to depenetration. A strong bond develops between Shrek and donkey, which they have complementary strengths and weaknesses. Shrek realizes that donkey is exceptionally loyal and persistent when faced with challenges. The relationship between Shrek and Fiona moves to the affective exchange phases because they both realize that they have many things in common. Fiona understands what it feels to be an ogre. She is also worried about the reaction of people when they see her. It is the mutual understanding between Shrek and Fiona that leads to their marriage. Therefore, Shrek 1 offers valuable lessons about communication.
