22 Sep 2022

143

How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex and the Family

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Academic level: College

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The paper will utilize the family systems theory concepts to analyze the vignette discussed in the previous assignment. The vignette discussed Jake a nine-year old child who lives with his parents. The child loves watching Hercules a superhero movie and wants to be like him because he believes he will be more likable and gain the attention of girls. The concepts I will utilize in the assessment are differentiation to self, nuclear family emotional process and the family projection process. Differentiation of self suggests that in the family unit each individual is distinct. In addition to having distinct personality traits, each family member is different in their vulnerability to being affected by others to fall to the group thinking mentality. The nuclear family emotional process includes four relationship patterns that regulate familial problems. The four main relationship patterns are marital function, impairment of a child, dysfunction of a spouse and emotional distance (Becvar & Becvar, 2017). The family projection process concept outlines how parents’ transfer the emotional issues to their children. Children are capable of inheriting many types of issues an example being strengths, the most significant inherited aspect is relationship sensitivity such as the need for approval from friends and the public. 

The differentiation of self-concept suggests that each individual in the family unit is unique. Each individual possesses individual personality traits and each family member differs in their vulnerability to being influenced by others to accept the group thinking mentality. The individual in the family who possesses a less developed sense of self is likely to be impacted by others and will unknowingly exert influence over other individuals. Each individual often has an inherent sense of self and the level to which the individual advances this sense of self is reliant on familial relationships during childhood (Becvar & Becvar, 2017). The concept applies to the vignette since the child described has a less developed sense of self. Jake the nine-year old described in the vignette has lost his sense of self to Hercules the superhero he loves watching on the television. The teachers and parents have noticed that Jake likes to seek attention. Jake has intimated to his mother that he would love to bulk up his muscles through working out and consuming protein powder. Jake is convinced that having muscles will make girls like him more just like Hercules his favorite hero. This is quite unusual for a nine-year old since a child at this age is often concerned about playing rather than working out. Jake has a less developed sense of self and that is why he was susceptible to the influence of groupthink mentality. Jake’s less developed sense of self has most certainly been influenced by his familial relationship. Jake’s family is mostly interdependent hence the weak differentiation of self of the family members. The family adapts to the stressful situation in the morning by letting Jake watch the Hercules movie rather than helping him adapt a healthy morning routine. 

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The family projection concept outlines how parents could transfer emotional issues and insecurities to their children (Becvar & Becvar, 2017). Children are in the developmental stage and therefore are capable of inheriting weaknesses and strengths from their parents. However the most significant inherited aspect is relationship sensitivities such as the desire for approval from others. Jake’s parents probably projected the strong need of approval from others to Jake and that is why he felt like he needed other kids and especially girls to like him. The parents focused their projection on Jake and most likely caused him to develop a less developed sense of self. The projection process often proceeds in three distinct steps; the parent highlights more attention on the child out of fear that the child has some shortcomings, the parent finds something in the child that confirms their fears and finally the parent considers that there is something wrong with the child. The three steps cycle often continues throughout the child’s life. For instance if the parents perceive that a child is not strong enough they often encourage him that he could be strong like a superhero and the child might lose his sense of self to a particular superhero. Jake’s parents might have projected their fears towards Jake making him yearn for the attention of his peers. 

The un-differentiation of self among the members of a nuclear family often results to four sequences of emotional functioning they include dysfunction in one spouse, marital conflicts, emotional distance and impairment of the children. As the tension in the family is enhanced, one spouse is more likely to show the anxiety they are experiencing on their marital partner and their marriage (Becvar & Becvar, 2017). The dysfunction in a spouse will coerce the spouse to think in a particular manner hence exercising dominance over the partner. This often causes a false sense of harmony but if stress rises the subordinate partners’ experiences anxiety. The next patters is impairment of one or more children. The parents might worry consistently about the child or have unrealistic expectations of the child. More focus on the child will cause them to be reactive, inhibiting their differentiation to self. The child often internalizes tension going on in the family leading to the loss of self as experienced in Jake’s case. Emotional distance often happens in conjunction with other relationship patterns. Jake was most likely avoiding the tension at home by watching the superhero movie hence establishing the emotional distance. 

References 

Becvar, R. J., & Becvar, D. S. (2017).  Systems theory and family therapy: A primer . Rowman & Littlefield. 

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StudyBounty. (2023, September 15). How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex and the Family.
https://studybounty.com/how-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-sex-and-the-family-essay

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