How would a world without communication look like? Don’t even try to imagine. It would be messy and not even one of the innovations we see today would have come to be. But let’s narrow down to communication in relationships. I want to believe that effective communication is critical not only when starting a relationship but also to maintain the warmth in that relationship. Communication is essential in that it strengthens qualities such as trust, respect, and honesty. This becomes a reality because every partner is always in touch with the other and they will know literally all their undertakings hence the ability to judge the motive even when something wrong has happened.
Another importance is that effective communication contributes to a great extent the morale, joy, and happiness in a relationship. Partners can live stress-free since there is always a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen to the burden of the heart. Although communication is vital, not all people can express their feelings and thoughts to people they interact with on daily basis. In this paper, I will address my inability to disclose my feelings in a significant relationship.
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I have come to realize that my interpersonal communication skills are wanting. This weakness is a great threat to my career, my job as well as my family at large but specifically my wife and children (Barker et al, 2018). My primary challenge is to express my feelings, to point out a problem, or even to bring on board my opinions on some issues in the workplace. This challenge can be detrimental to my future as well as the future of those who are related to me. That is why I have taken it upon myself to identify the cause, or rather the source of this adverse inability to communicate effectively.
One theory to explain this challenge is social exchange theory and inferiority complex . This feeling of being not equal to the task, having a lot of doubts and uncertainties as well as having low self-esteem is a major cause of my inability to disclose feeling in meaningful relationships. This is often manifested during my interactions with others, during which I often have the tendency to reveal unnecessary information about myself just to fit-in.
The second theory is the theory of relational dialects theory. This theory describes the condition that makes an individual have difficulty in describing his or her feelings to other people (Hargie, 2016). This often causes a discourse in during communication, making it difficult for me to express myself or people to understand me. In some instances, I am not able to identify and interpret my feelings and even to distinguish between the feelings and bodily sensations resulting from emotional arousal. This discourse in communication greatly servers relationships.
The theory of working memory also affects communication. This theory is describes as the tendency to use the long term memory instead of the working memory. Accessing information in the longtime memory takes time; hence I find it difficult to respond to agent mattes or questions I had not prepared for (Brown et al, 2018). This inability to explain a concept without struggling leads to anxiety and fears which altogether contributes to my inability to disclose feeling in relationships.
My action plan to improve communication in that involves practicing to give a non-verbal signal that will indicate that I am thinking or even buying time by asking the other person to let me think about the matter. I can also act or do positive things that will express what I feel and when the other person appreciates my actions I will take that opportunity to verbally communicate or express my feelings (Huang, 2018). Another thing that I must commit myself to is to, again and again, remind myself that I am important, unique and capable of achieving great things so that I will be able to fight the inferiority complex.
In conclusion, much as communication is critical in our day to day life, it is not everyone who can articulate their thoughts in feelings appropriately. I am among those that are unable to disclose feelings in relationships. But now that I have been able to identify the theories behind this challenge and the necessary actions that I am ready to undertake to deal with it, I am confident that in a few months the problem will be a thing of the past. Someone said where there is a will there is a way and with persistence and determination, everything can be achieved, and this is my slogan moving onwards.
References
Brown C. E., Back A. L., Ford, D. W. (2018). Self- assessment scores improve after simulation-based palliative care communication skills workshops. Journals.sagepub.com
Huang, X. (2018). Improving communication competence through synchronous communication in computer-supported collaborative learning environments: A systematic review. Mdpi.com
Barker, M., Fejzic, J., & Mark, A. S. (2018). Simulated learning for generic communication competency development: a case study of Australian post-graduate pharmacy students . Higher education research - Taylor & Francis
Hargie, O. (2016). Skilled interpersonal communication: Research, theory and practice . Routledge.
