In one of the most intriguing books on the human connection, Brene Brown sought to incorporate her ideas on the potential harms of shame, the need for courage, and the necessity of vulnerability in Daring Greatly. In the text, Brown uses personal narratives and stories about the lives of others, as well as information from her extensive research work. The text creates room to learn about the pain of disconnection, as well as the potential negative attributes associated with shaming others and self. Besides, the text highlights a platform for integrating practical strategies in combating shame and facilitation of the development of shame resilience. Critically, in this reflective essay, the focus is on illustrating the issue of vulnerability, as well as the potentiality to use it as an approach to achieve personal development at the personal and interpersonal levels.
Summary
In her TED Talk Video, “ the Power of Vulnerability,” Brene Brown highlights her views on the ability of the individuals to empathize, love, and belong in the poignant, funny interaction. Brene uses the chance to document her insights on research for personal reflection and comprehension of humanity (Brown, 2010). In the assessment of the essence of vulnerability, Brene Brown came into a conclusion concerning the essence of shame as the fear associated with disconnection. From the video, it is evident that love, as well as belonging are the most common feelings for the people who feel worthy of themselves. The video also captures the essence of compassion, courage, and connection to face imperfection on the road to the full embracing of vulnerability. The key to overcoming challenges of vulnerability is the attitudes of an individual to embrace these mistakes; thus, the need to believe that we are sufficient.
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In the development of her book, Daring Greatly, Brown focuses on describing vulnerability as the aspects of risks, uncertainties, and emotional exposure; thus, the unstable feeling people get through stepping out of their comfort zones or execute things forcing them to loosen control (Brown, 2015). From this perspective, vulnerability is at the center of meaningful human experiences. Following years of exploring and studying vulnerability, as well as shame, Brown concluded that the things that scare individuals might be good for them; thus, the potentiality of transforming vulnerability into joy. Besides, the text highlights the influence of vulnerability being genuine while showing up in the development of real, loving, and honest relationships.
In the second chapter of the text, Brown uses insights and research to debunk some of the vulnerability myths, which might affect the society and potentiality of the individuals to achieve success in their growth and human connection. In this reading, the first myth is the myth terming vulnerability as a weakness. The platform creates room for Brown to document that vulnerability is not a weakness; thus, the need for people to step into the arena and depict courage. The second myth is the perception that ‘I don’t do vulnerability (Brown, 2015).’ In this case, Brown uses the text in highlighting the inbuilt nature of feelings and emotions as the conditions for human vulnerability. The approach to close the door to vulnerability is a reflection of an approach by people to close the door on the meaningful and beautiful aspects of our lives.
People will always experience vulnerability regardless of the condition; the only difference is the approach they choose to respond to the experienced vulnerability. Brown tackles the perception that vulnerability is putting everything in the public domain by documenting the fact that vulnerability is not oversharing. Vulnerability does not entail pestering strangers with feelings or broken hearts on offline and online platforms. Rather, vulnerability relates to sharing of the experiences and feelings with the limited inner circle of individuals, thus, integral aspect associated with trust-building process to develop a sense of belonging and experience the desired love (Brown, 2015). The final myth in this chapter is the perception of going through a vulnerability in isolation. Brown notes that vulnerability is about the collective tackling of the issue while asking for help.
In the third chapter, Brown uses her experiences and research insights as a platform to incorporate strategies and approaches to comprehend, as well as combat shame. In this chapter, it is evident that shame is a common feature among the people unless they are sociopaths. The chapter notes the need to keep shame under control while acting appropriately in spite of its existence. The vulnerability relates to the development of shame resilience. Shame is powerful because of the inability of people to speak about it; thus, the need to enhance awareness on the issue of shame and interacting with others on it as a mechanism to tackle it (Brown, 2015). The chapter highlights the 12 categories of shame concerning money and work, family, parenting, addiction, sex, aging, appearance and body, mental and physical health, religion, stereotyping, and surviving trauma.
Moreover, the text uses examples of people describing their feelings associated with shame on issues to do with infertility, raging at children, bankruptcy, and divorce, among others. Notably, Brown documents the need to engage in sharing things as the key vulnerability in the moment of our lives. The chapter also tackles shame, guilt, and self-talk in describing the issues of vulnerability. Combating shame relates to the systematic approach associated with recognition and comprehension of the triggers, critical awareness, reaching out, speaking on the shame, and owning the story.
Critique
From the main points in the assigned readings, one apparent thing is the fact that critics do not count. The people who point out that others experience shame do not matter. All the things that matter is the man in the arena. The man who experiences shame and comes out with the motivation to strive valiantly. Every people have the chance to err, come short on numerous occasion (Chödrön, 2008). There is no effort without error and shortcoming. The people who matter are the individuals striving to achieve deeds through enthusiasm and great devotions.
The text outlines what vulnerability is, as well as reasons why it is good for people. The unstable feeling is vulnerability, which is not a sign of weakness. People fail to learn that vulnerability reflects the emotions and experiences that people crave to achieve in their lives. Vulnerability is the representation of the source of love, courage, joy, creativity, and empathy. Vulnerability is a reflection of the insecurity, which is present in all people. Vulnerability is strong to the extent of causing people to avoid situations, which might make them fragile; thus, the need to consider adopting diverse approaches to avoid the shaky aspects of vulnerability. In practicing ‘daring greatly’ in our lives, the assigned readings are vital in creating steps to enable the achievement of the desired outcome.
In the first aspect, there is a need for the recognition of the influence of enormous courage to face vulnerability. Second, people might understand the need to let go of the consistent worriers on the perceptions of others. It is also ideal to avoid the pursuit of perfection as humans have the platform to error in efforts to become better. When feeling overwhelmed with the issues, people should consider breathing gently and integrating sensations into their bodies for few minutes before returning to the task.
So What/Reflection
From the readings, I believe that vulnerability is the source of connection, as well as the feeling of worthiness. I will use the key points in the readings as a platform to alter my life to experience or develop a sense of worthiness. For instance, from the text, it is vital to depict self-awareness to avoid bottling up the emotions. In most cases, people focus on hiding their emotions or running away from them. After exploring the readings, it is evident that this causes consistent or continuous stress and pain with far-reaching consequences. Following Brown’s perception, I need to be self-aware in the exploration of the emotions while asking relevant questions in connecting to how I feel and think in specific moments. Besides, I gained knowledge that courage is a critical tool in overcoming vulnerability. Vulnerability is anything rather than weakness; thus, the need for true courage in encouraging myself to be vulnerable.
Furthermore, I believe in showing up, as well as facing fears and moving forward on the issues affecting my growth and development (Brown, 2015). Critically, it is appropriate to consider achieving excellence rather than perfection. Perfectionism is not about growth, personal achievement, and improvement, but avoidance and fear. As individuals, we need to concentrate on the realization of excellence regardless of the flaws. The approach is healthy, inclusive, and developmental, as opposed to the weakened aspects of the flawed perfectionism. The final lesson from the readings is the need to dare to be me regardless of the cost. The approach is vital in creating awareness on the strengths, skills, and the enormous beauty in embracing flaws and insecurities as an approach to dealing with vulnerability. In this aspect, I will have the chance to realize and achieve the true benefit of the spirit in dealing with vulnerability.
References
Brown, B. (2010). The power of vulnerability. TED talk . Retrieved from https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability/transcript?language=en
Brown, B. (2015). Daring greatly: How the courage to be vulnerable transforms the way we live, love, parent, and lead . Penguin.
Chödrön, P. (2008). Comfortable with uncertainty: 108 teachings on cultivating fearlessness and compassion . Shambhala Publications.
