A marriage is the most basic and important of all human unions. To those with religious leanings, it is considered a sacred union that brings together two people with different upbringings and personalities to be one. When two people come together in marriage, they usually have the motive to stay together all their lives. This is however usually not the case in some cases as the union of marriage may collapse and hence fail. A failed marriage is one that has reached a state where the two people involved cannot agree on anything but to separate and live different lives.
Over the course of time, commitment to the union of marriage has waned from generation to generation. Older generations from a long time ago took marriage seriously and everything in a family revolved around it. This aspect has however changed with the younger and current generation having very little or no interest at all in the institution of marriage. The tenets of every culture around the world are different in so many ways but they all have one main thing in common, the fact that marriage is destined until death separates the couple. This means committing the rest of your adult life to living with someone.
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The rate at which marriages are failing at the moment is alarming as many married couples are headed to divorce lawyers’ offices every single day to file for separation from their spouses. This trend has been attributed mainly to the fact that couples do not grow and mature at the same time. They also grow apart with time due to many reasons and start losing interest on each other. Due to the increased life span, there has been an increase in the number of years that one is expected to stay in marriage.
Another key reason that has been given to be the reason for failed marriages is the issue of difference in occupations. Commitment to their workplaces has driven a wedge between many couples leading to the dissolution of marriage due to loss of interest from one side or else from both. A long time ago, the work of the man of the house was mainly to fend for the family while the woman stayed home as a housewife and taking care of the family. This traditional set was just perfect for the union of marriage and a happy family. This has however changed with everyone having their professional requirements to attend to. This aspect has been cited as a leading factor in the failure of marriage.
Strains in marriage have also been credited to the occurrence of traumatic events such as the loss of a child in a marriage or else when one loses a job. These kind of aspects have been attributed to cause strains in marriages that may eventually lead to the collapse of the institution. It also can be due to the birth of a new bone or when a couple buy a new residence. Despite the fact that these are usually in all essence good things, they may be a reason that leads to the loss of interest in one’s partner leading to misunderstandings and the failure of the marriage in the end.
Marriage can also fail due to undue influence from outside the union. Most of the time members of the family either parents, uncles, aunts or even siblings are they main culprits here. Due to their disapproval of one’s choice, they may be involved in the destroying of a marriage through putting uncalled for pressure on their son or daughter. They mostly do this through concentrating on the negative characteristics of the spouse until they affect the marriage beyond repair. This may end up forcing the stressed out party to seek divorce and hence an end to the marriage.
Divorce lawyers have attributed the failure of marriage also to the aspect of boredom. Having the same lifestyle doing the same things over and over for a very long time may lead one to indulge in escape avenues such as adopting drug abuse and alcoholism as an escape from boredom. This behavior will in the end affect the marriage and may put a strain on the marital bonds and hence lead to its dissolution. This is because it may lead to one spouse being withdrawn and to lose interest in their partner.
The failure of a marriage is a very sad event especially if there are children involved. Children coming from a broken home have been known to go through a lot of difficulties in their lives especially if the parents divorce when they are young. It is therefore essential to understand the importance of what the failure of a marriage mean to the people around you. Children from failed marriages will most probably end up in failed marriages themselves. This is because they grow up without people to look up to and to emulate. When one choses to get married, it should be for better, for worse.
References
DuCanto, J. N. (1990). Taking Your Lawyer to the Altar: A Different Perspective on Premarital Agreements. Prob. & Prop., 4, 47.
Huston, T. L. (2009). What's love got to do with it? Why some marriages succeed and others fail. Personal Relationships, 16(3), 301-327.
Bernard, J. (1982). The future of marriage. Yale University Press.