I am a staunch believer in Christ for the past eight years now. My Christian life began at my childhood because I was born and raised up in a Christian family. As a young boy, I did not understand what Christianity meant, but only did what I saw my family members do. We could pray before eating and sleeping. I was so innocent and humble, not because I had received salvation, but because I was born and found that it was a way of life in the family. My family members played a crucial role in influencing my Christian life at my early childhood days. My father was a pastor and a very strict man who entertained no nonsense. I remember one day when he slapped me because I did not pray before going to bed. My relationship with him was very poor due to his strictness.
Things began to change when I was 13 years. This was the time I began being rebellious about my father’s strictness on Christianity. I started questioning why he would force me into practicing a belief that I did not understand. I had a few friends who came from atheists families and the more we interacted, the more I became more rebellious and started questioning Christianity ( Campbell, 2004). I could frequently ask my close friends whether their fathers are also strict on Christianity like my father was. But none of them experienced the kind of strictness I was being subjected to by my father. I could hear in church when the pastor says that Jesus died for us, but I could not understand how and what it meant. Even though I loved my father, our relationship was so strained because I felt he was forcing me into something I did not understand at a time when my friends were free to believe what they wanted. I could pray in the presence of my father, not because I meant to pray, but because I feared his wrath.
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When I was 15 years, my father was diagnosed with prostate cancer making his health deteriorate. He got weak day by day and holding his faith that God will heal him. He could read bible verses about having faith in God even at the times of trial. His famous bible verse was “Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering” (Hebrews 10: 23). Despite his constant prayers and visiting various hospitals seeking treatment, his health worsened, the family resources got depleted on medical bills, and life got unbearable. This was the time I started to ask myself why God could leave his servant to suffer from the disease to that extent if he genuinely cares. I thought that staunch Christians like my father was, could not suffer because God would rescue them. As his situation got worse, I got worried, life unbearable to me and everything seemed terrible. I could not bear the pain that my father was going through. I remember one day talking to my teacher about my father’s situation, and he told me to keep faith in God. I could not understand how I could keep on trusting a God who remains silent when his own servants are suffering. I wondered how a loving and caring God could sit and watch without doing anything even as a strong Christian suffers unbearably. I lost my faith in God, and all I wanted was to see my father get better. I would cry everyday helplessly as I saw my dad lying in his sickbed suffering.
One Saturday evening marked the beginning of my Christian life and the day my life changed completely. I was walking home; I came across a youth rally that was being held at a local church after school. I heard the speaker talk about sinning against God and having wavering faith. He said that young people should get salvation and have a strong faith in God. The theme was about faith, staying clean from sins and avoiding to doubt the presence of God. He read Luke 18: 17, which states that “assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it.” I heard the teachings on the acts of faith as an act that tests a person’s religious beliefs ( Bannister, & Remenyi, 2000). Under Christian teachings, we are taught that “blessed are those who remain steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him” ( Sanders, 2017 ). From this day, I felt that I had been a sinner. I understood that what my father was going through could only be a trial and that I needed to remain steadfast and keep my faith strong. The preacher, who was also a young man, made me give my life to Christ.
The condition under which my father was, and the hard times we were facing as a family made me reflect on my life and felt that it was only God who could help at such a time. I joined my family members to pray for my father. I started attending bible studies every day and prayed every evening as I sought for God’s grace in the healing of my father. As I met more young Christians, they encouraged me about the importance of having unwavering faith in God and the need to pray every day. Currently, I am a staunch believer in Christ, a belief that developed due to the problematic situation we passed through as a family and the interaction with other Christians. That day I attended a sermon at the local church in the evening greatly influenced what I believe in today and strengthened my faith which was initially wavering.
References
Bannister, F., & Remenyi, D. (2000). Acts of faith: instinct, value and IT investment decisions. Journal of information Technology , 15 (3), 231-241.Retrieved from: https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Dan_Remenyi2/publication/233600257_Acts_of_faith_Instinct_value_and_IT_investment_decisions/links/547492a50cf2778985abe8c2.pdf
Campbell, D. E. (2004). Acts of faith: Churches and political engagement. Political behavior , 26 (2), 155-180.Retrieved from: http://wcfia.harvard.edu/files/wcfia/files/859_campbell_david_acts_of_faith.pdf
Sanders, J. O. (2017). Spiritual leadership: Principles of excellence for every believer . Moody Publishers. Retrieved from: https://www.moodypublishers.com/mpimages/Marketing/WEB%20Resources/ProductExcerpts/9780802496645-TOC-CH1.pdf
