Sexual language is one of the hardest language due to the different attitudes, and belief on the issue of sexuality. Sex education and changes in the sexual regards as being a sin or wrong is changing in the world today but the ability for people to communicate freely with each other on sexual activities and use of sexual words is still challenging (Greenberg, Bruess, & Oswalt, 2013). The table below illustrate the different sexual words that are commonly used by different people when regarding female genitals, male genitals and intercourse but the words are mostly regarded as vulgar by most but in order to accomplish the goal of learning to become comfortable with sexual language, such words are important depending on the person one uses the words to. They enable comfort of using the words rather than shy away or panic when the words are used.
The periodic table illustrates the most common words used by people to describe intercourse, genitals for both male and females. Of all the names intended to refer to male genitals, penis, is the most common name as it is used by parents, doctors among other people whereas vagina is used by most people to refer to a female genital. Words like cock, dick, pussy and twat are the most used by people who are completely comfortable with sexual language and are used by friends describing the genitals or couples. Most parents regard to intercourse as sex or act of making babies to their children whereas couples and counselors may use words like making love. Friends mostly men are more likely to use words like fucking or banging to illustrate their superiority and domination of the women or sex partners (Greenberg, Bruess, & Oswalt, 2013). There are many words in the periodical table that are used as sexual language words but most are vulgar to most people and not appropriate to be used in public.
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There are similarities and differences observed in the terminology used and the reasons for the similarities and differences which may be due to attitude towards sexuality by an individual, parents and the society. The reasons may also be due to an individual’s knowledge on human sexuality that leads to individual comfort level with sexual topics.
Attitudes toward Sexuality
The aim of this section is to discuss the different attitudes of individuals, parents and the society towards sexuality. The discussion will enlighten the reader on the reasons behind similarity and differences of the sexual terminologies used by people.
Individual/Personal attitude
Most people grow up in religious families where they are led to believe that sexual activities before marriage is wrong. I was raised to know that it was wrong to be too close to opposite sex and my parents did not want me to have female friends whereas my sister was not required to have male friends. As we grew up in a conservative family, we were very naïve on sexual education but once in high school, my peers taught me most of the things I know about sexuality and ways to start a romantic relationship with a female. Since then, I have many female friends and issues like kissing and body touching is part of my daily life. Most of my friends are accustomed to sexual language and use it more freely to their female friends unlike me who mostly use them when am with my friends of similar sex. We use dirty words to describe female gentles and describing what we see in pornographic films. The association with my peers has changed my attitude towards sexuality thus increased my urge to role play with the many girlfriends I have.
Parents
The attitude towards sexuality has changed due to the generational changes and sexual activities before marriage is currently accepted but most parents still face huge challenges in educating their children on sexuality or advising them on the best way to handle their sexual urges. Most of our parents still believe that abstaining is the best way for youths to handle their sexuality. Additionally, they also concede that youths are currently engaging in premarital activities. Although they claim and believe that youths are engaging in sexual activities, they are hypocritical on conceding that their children are involving in the acts. They are thus strict to children and ensure they know all their children’s friends. When most girls hit puberty, their mothers advise them that playing with boys or males will lead to pregnancy (Canary, & Kathryn, 2009). The topic is never discussed further but most of the parents’ attitude towards sexuality is changing hence they may enlighten their children on ways to use protection during sex.
Society
The society is more lenient on the issue of sexuality since the 1960s as people become more conversant with sexual education. Although the society is changing, the religious guidance on sexuality is still followed whereby, women are viewed as inferior as they are prohibited to engage in intercourse with many men but men are allowed as it is seen as a common thing. The society has also accepted same sex sexuality which was viewed as a taboo in the past few decades (Canary, & Kathryn, 2009). The acceptance does not portray total acceptance as the gays and lesbians are still viewed negatively depending on the culture and religious beliefs prevailing in the society. Teen engagement in sexual activity is also viewed as wrong due to the results of teenagers engaging in sexual activities (Bancroft, & Workshop on Sexual Development. 2003). The use of sexual language is thus limited to the adults who understand sexuality and forbidden in public to ensure preservation of high morals.
Conclusion
The learning on human sexuality has increased my awareness on sexual language and enabled me appreciate the act with different genders as it will enable procreation and be in accordance to the religious beliefs. I believe that the tension or challenges of comfortably use of sexual language is due to the beliefs and raising of an individual thus I am still not comfortable to use the language in public as it portrays moral decay. I believe that parents should be more open when engaging in sexual education with their children but it is difficult due to the respect and change of attitude (Canary, & Kathryn, 2009), that may result when the parent becomes too open to the children.
References
Bancroft, J., & Workshop on Sexual Development. (2003). Sexual development in childhood . Bloomington: Indiana Univ. Press.
Greenberg, J. S., Bruess, C. E., & Oswalt, S. B. (2013). Exploring the dimensions of human sexuality. Jones & Bartlett Publishers.
Canary, J. D., & Kathryn, D., (2009). Sex Differences and Similarities in Communication . Language Arts & Disciplines, Routledge
