30 Aug 2022

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How "Silver Linings Playbook" perfectly captures the different aspects of interpersonal communication

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Interpersonal communication involves an interactive conversation between people who mutually influence each other. It enables people to build, maintain, and end their relationships. This type of communication occurs in different contexts such as at organizational, intercultural, and computer-mediated levels. In the film Silver Lining’s Playbook, different aspects of interpersonal communication are demonstrated. The paper will discuss various interpersonal communication methods as they apply in the movie. The concepts utilized include self-disclosure, self-concept, relational spirals, family conformity, non-verbal cues, and gender, emotions, and relationship stages ( Wood, 2015) . 

The film Silver Lining’s Playbook is about the life of a man called Pat who has a bipolar condition. He had spent most of his time in the hospital, and after he was discharged, he was forced by circumstance to move back to his parents' home. The bipolar condition led to his termination from employment and separation from his wife, Nikki. In the process of adjusting to the unfortunate circumstances in his life, he meets Tiffany, a woman who had just lost his husband. At the beginning of the movie, he was obsessed with his old life, but with self-disclosure to Tiffany and family conformity, he started to embrace the fact that he was mentally unstable. 

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In the first scene of the film, listening is one of the concepts that emerged. According to Wood (2015 ), listening in interpersonal communication helps in providing responses and reactions. The feedback indicates that parties involved have understood or misunderstood the intended meaning of the information offered. In the film, Pat lacked listening skills. He can pay attention to what people say, but unfortunately, he struggles with the interpretation and evaluation part of the listening process of communication due to the bipolar condition. The issues are demonstrated when he was hosted by his friends Ronnie and Veronica. Ronnie tells Pat not to discuss with Tiffany, a sister to Veronica, anything that involves her husband, but due to poor interpretation, he asked Tiffany about her husband. Apart from poor evaluation of information, Pat also exhibits defensive listening challenges in the movie. Onyeator & Okpara (2019) argued that defensive listening leads to perceiving innocent comments from others as personal attacks. The problem is associated with jealousy, guilt, insecurity, and lack of confidence in other people. After being discharged from the hospital, Pat has many ideas regarding what he desires to do to live his life before being admitted to the hospital. He views that he will return to his normal life by engaging in his profession and having Nikki back. However, people around him are aware that it is impossible for him to neither work again nor live with Nikki. Pat’s friends, such as Veronica and Ronnie and family members, tried to convince him that engaging in routine duties in life like before being affected by the bipolar condition is impossible. In response, Pat exhibits defensive listening skills by highlighting that “you only want to bring me down” ( Waisbord, 2020 ). Since he views that he can get back to his previous lifestyle, his responses are characterized by defensive communication methods such as anger to anyone who tries to sway him from his mission of going working and getting his wife back. He views that people are attacking him because they are jealous of his prosperity. 

Due to the existence of complicated characters such as Pat in the film, another aspect of interpersonal communication is emotions. Both primary and secondary emotions were exhibited. Emotions are viewed as "physiological, behavioral, and they communicate reactions to stimuli that are cognitively processed and experienced emotional" ( Wood, 2015 ). Blended or primary emotions such as surprise, acceptance, and fear influence interpersonal communication between people ( DeVito, 2019 ). Throughout the movie, Pat does not exhibit one particular emotion. For instance, the case of blended emotions was seen in different parts of the movie. One of the cases of expression of his primary emotions was when he flashbacked about his ex-wife's infidelity. He expressed different forms of emotions, including anger and sadness. He also expressed surprise and confusion by playing the song sung during his wedding with Nikki ( Farber, 2016) . Due to Pat's bipolar disease, a hot state of emotion is seen. Hot emotions are expressed due to the high arousal level that one experiences because of health conditions or activities. In the film, Pat was the most affected character due to the bipolar condition. When he is angry, Pat expresses his feeling using an angry tone. On the contrary, when he is happy, he is kind and hyper. The hot emotion that expresses anger was shown when Pat stormed his parent’s bedroom in the middle of the night after reading a book by Hemingway. Pat's parents had understood him, and thus, they exhibited a cool emotional state. His parents calmed him down, but instead, he became angrier because he did not understand why his effort of reading Hemingway's book to the end was not crucial to his parents ( Waisbord, 2020 ). Despite that, his parents kept encouraging him to go to bed in a cool manner. 

The self-concept was another important interpersonal communication prevalent in Silver Lining’s Playbook. Self-concept is the overall idea about how one thinks about who they are, their interests, and personal perceptions based on the situations they face ( Wood, 2015 ). In most parts of the movie, Pat's self-perception is altered due to the bipolar condition, which results in conflicts with different people, such as his parents and Tiffany ( Waisbord, 2020 ). In the first half of the film, Pat is convinced that he is still married to Nikki despite being told by his parents and friends that she has been remarried and does not love him anymore. The information makes him hostile and aggressive towards his family and friends. In particular, the self-concept is the leading cause of difficulties in communication between Pat and the people in his life. He used the concept to control the way he views others. The social influence that contributes to his aggressive self-perception is associated with others' feedback concerning his current marriage state and mentality (( Farber, 2016 ). His self-presentation also contributed to self-perception. Pat views that he is not mentally unstable and that his wife is still with him, which causes conflicts with family and friends. 

The concept of relationship spirals was presented in the movie. According to Onyeator & Okpara (2019) , relationship spirals intensify a partner’s behavior by the other. It can be progressive, leading to the creation of a positive environment between the partners. Spirals in interpersonal communication can also be negative, which entails continuous dissatisfaction with partners ( Onyeator & Okpara, 2019 ). In Silver Lining’s Playbook film, the negative spiral was demonstrated, but specifically the escalatory conflict type. An escalatory conflict spiral entails disconfirming messages to reinforce another disconfirming message ( Waisbord, 2020 ). The conversation between Pat and Tiffany was characterized by reinforced disconfirming messages. Throughout the movie, the communication between Tiffany and Pat was characterized by negative feelings towards one another. Similarly, their conversations were expressed in a fragile manner. The communication method led to tension between the two partners, leading to escalatory conflict spirals ( Farber, 2016) . For instance, during their first meeting at a dinner party, Tiffany was instructed not to talk to Pat about his ex-wife, whereas Pat was told not to talk to Tiffany about her husband because he had just passed away. However, when they started their conversation, the first thing that Pat inquired from Tiffany was, "how did your husband die," in response, Tiffany replied by asking Pat, "how is your wife" ( Waisbord, 2020 ). The example provided demonstrates how Tiffany and Pat utilized negative disconfirming messages in their initial communication part. The use of disconfirming messages in most parts of the film contributed to Pat and Tiffany's constant conflicts. 

Another form of interpersonal communication demonstrated in the film is gender influence on non-verbal communication cues. Nonverbal communication entails body language, such as facial expression, to express feelings and ideas. DeVito (2019 ) outlined that gender differences differ in how they use nonverbal cues to illustrate behaviors and skills in interpersonal communication methods. For instance, in women, the common forms of nonverbal communication used are smaller interpersonal distances, smiling, gazing, nodding, and gestural and facial expressions. On the other hand, moment uses methods such as writing letters or buying flowers ( Farber, 2016) . The nonverbal communication used by women portrays different meanings to them compared to how men perceive it. The lack of similar ideas on nonverbal cues contributes to misunderstanding in the interpersonal communication process. The expression of different feelings and messages through nonverbal cues in the film allows the audience to understand Tiffany and Pat's personality. They are similar in the sense that both are aggressive and hostile, and also, they express sweet relational understanding. Despite that, their gender separates how they communicate. For instance, when they were rehearsing for the dance competition, Tiffany's nonverbal communication portrays a romantic feeling towards Pat Waisbord, 2020) . She used a lot of facial expressions, such as gazing. She also utilized kinesics to reflect how she liked Pat. On the contrary, Pat did not show any sign of affection, and he did not understand why Tiffany kept staring at him. As a result of a lack of understanding between them, it resulted in miscommunication. Tiffany was frustrated because she thought that Pat did not have romantic feelings towards her. However, during the dance competition that Tiffany and Pat performed before their family and friends, the feelings and emotions in which they demonstrated showed how they liked each other. Pat was making eye contact throughout the dancing process, whereas Tiffany reciprocated by smiling ( Onyeator & Okpara, 2019) . At the end of the dancing scene, Pat wrote a letter expressing his love, but Tiffany misinterpreted it. For instance, when she saw the letter, Tiffany was convinced that Pat had written the note for his ex-wife. From the dancing scene, one concludes that men and women use different nonverbal communication methods. As Tiffany demonstrated, women use gazing and smiling to show their feelings, whereas men are reserved in expressing their desires. Pat expressed his love to Tiffany through the use of a letter. 

After the dancing competition, the film presents a sequence of self-disclosure between Pat and Tiffany. Self-disclosure entails sharing of personal information with someone else. According to social penetration theory, getting to know someone else involves a reciprocal process of disclosing personal information to change the depth and breadth of relationship development ( Farber, 2016 ). In the opening and even towards the mid of the film, Pat and Tiffany were not sharing private information. Such resulted in disconfirming information as described earlier. However, as the movie progresses, they started to open up to each other. For instance, Pat told Tiffany about his mental health and his ex-wife ( Farber, 2016) . In response, Tiffany also opened up to Pat about her private information. The process contributed to building up trust, and consequently, it facilitated the dance competition between Pat and Tiffany. In the initial stages of self-disclosure, the primary purpose was to enable them to dance together. However, towards the end of the movie, self-disclosure was used to develop their love relationship ( Farber, 2016 ). For instance, during the football game in which Nikki was present, Tiffany thought they were planning to get back with Pat. However, due to self-disclosure, Pat explained to Tiffany that he does not love Nikki anymore and wishes to have a relationship with her. 

Towards the end of the movie, conformity orientation was depicted by Pat’s family. DeVito (2019 ) argues that the family determines the degree to which it can encourage its members to communicate and interact with each other. In some families, low conversational orientation exists, whereas in others, it is limited. In a high oriented family, members communicate without restrictions, whereas in a low conversational orientation, the topics of conversations are generally restricted ( Waisbord, 2020) . In Pat’s family, it was based on low conformity orientation. Pat’s father demonstrated how he desired his son to follow the family interests, such as watching the football game because before he was affected by bipolar disorder, he was a great fan of the Eagles team. Pat's father encouraged his son to conform to family routine activities such as watching a football game together ( Farber, 2016) . The family views that the method will allow him to forget about his ex-wife and employment. By figuring out his family value, Pat stays to watch the game that was being played in Philadelphia. Despite that, he tells his family that he needed an opportunity to choose the things he desires to do. However, his father tells him that his restriction is geared towards suppressing the effects of bipolar condition and separation from his wife. Apart from the conformity per se, the role of the family is also exhibited in the movie. The family in interpersonal communication plays an integral role in the overall communication process. It allows for the development of open and honest conversation. The family facilitates the creation of atmospheres that fosters the expression of each family member's needs, concerns, and desires. In the film, Pat's parents were a good example of the family role ( Waisbord, 2020) . When Pat went back home after discharge from the hospital, his parents molded and provide desired care. Despite that, in most cases, Pat did not cooperate due to his aggressive behavior, the family understood. 

The movie also demonstrated the relationship stages. In particular, experimentation, bonding, and dissolution were observed. The relationship development stages are the processes that people follow in creating mutual understanding. These stages have been classified as coming together and coming apart ( Onyeator & Okpara, 2019 ). Coming together is based on initiating, experimenting, and intensifying, integrating, bonding, differentiating, and circumscribing ( Onyeator & Okpara, 2019 ). The coming apart stages include stagnating, avoiding, and terminating. In the movie, the experimentation and bonding stage was demonstrated by the relationship between Tiffany and Pat, while dissolution or terminating was evident in the relationship between Pat and Nikki. The experimentation stage entails sharing of information between parties that are interested in establishing a relationship. The stage allows people to move the feeling that they are strangers to the friends . In Silver Lining’s Playbook , the relationship's experimentation stage was shown by Tiffany and Pat's conversation. It led to know each other better, finding common interests through dancing and flirting ( DeVito, 2019) . In the scene encompassing the dinner date, Tiffany and Pat shared information about what they faced after losing their partners. As they shared the information, they expressed a sense of the intimate moment. For instance, a spark of intimacy was depicted by how they communicated and touched each other from time to time. The aspect of dissolution was also demonstrated in the film ( DeVito, 2019) . Notably, Nikki and Pat ended their relationship officially during the football game. The problems that contributed to the termination were cheating and lack of intimacy. Despite that the audience could not hear what Pat was telling Nikki, his choice of running thereafter to Tiffany showed that their relationship ended. After being whispering, Nikki's face was covered with sadness, indicating that her marriage with Pat had been dissolved. 

Conclusion 

The movie Silver Lining Playbook demonstrates various concepts of interpersonal communication. The movie presents an understanding of dysfunctional individuals who develop a relationship by utilizing various interpersonal communication methods. Throughout the film, concepts such as self-disclosure, self-concept, relationship development stages, the family's role in interpersonal communication, family conformity, and gender influence on nonverbal cues, relational spirals, and listening helped in the development of mutual communication between Pat and Tiffany. 

The movie Silver Lining’s Playbook presents dysfunctional individuals who create a relationship using different communication ways. The relationship spirals self-concept, the role of gender in influencing non-verbal cues, and self-disclosure enabled Pat and Tiffany to resolve the communication barrier they experienced. Thus, the film defines diverse communication ways that can result in the creation of relationships regardless of the existence of barriers. Interpersonal communication plays an integral role in building strong and positive relationships and terminating them in case of mistrust issues. The actors, such as Tiffany and Pat, were able to develop and bond their relationship because of communication theories and concepts. Interpersonal communication also helped in the management of conflicts in the film. Pat's parents and friends were aware of his aggressive nature due to the underlying condition, thus allowing room for guidance and understanding depicted by the kind tone in their conversations. For the successful development of a conversation, paying attention to the speaker is vital in the interpersonal method. The process helps in preventing issues such as disconfirming messages, which were experienced in the film. People need to pay attention to different stages of listening, such as evaluation of the message conveyed. 

References 

DeVito, J. A. (2019). The interpersonal communication book. Instructor 1 , 18. https://lccn.loc.gov/2017037905 

Farber, S. K. (2016). Unresolved Grief Disguised as Self-Injury: The Message from Silver Linings Playbook.  Attachment: New Directions in Relational Psychoanalysis and Psychotherapy 10 (2), 132-151. https://www.pep-web.org/document.php?id=ajrpp.010.0132a 

Onyeator, I., & Okpara, N. (2019). Human communication in a digital age: perspectives on interpersonal communication in the family.  New Media and Mass Communication 78 , 35-45. https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/234653577.pdf 

Waisbord, S. (2020). Family tree of theories, methodologies, and strategies in development communication.  Handbook of communication for development and social change , 93-132. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-981-15-2014-3_56 

Wood, J. (2015). Communication mosaics: An introduction to the field of communication (8thed.). Mason, OH: Cengage Learning http://library.lol/main/3D524D8BA7E8A2CF678E7DA7295DDC52 

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StudyBounty. (2023, September 16). How "Silver Linings Playbook" perfectly captures the different aspects of interpersonal communication.
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