The relationship between Sternberg's triangular theory of love and types of adult attachment by Baumeister and Bushman
Robert Sternberg advanced the triangular theory of love (Sternberg, 1988). The theory is known as the Sternberg’s Theory of Love and is commonly explained in a triangular form. This theory states that interpersonal relationships are made up of three major components of love namely intimacy, passion and commitment (Sandberg et al. 2017). According to the theory, the first component, intimacy, refers to the feeling of connectedness, closeness, and attachment. The passion component refers to the intense level a person feels when he/she gets to like another person. It entails both romantic and sexual attraction. Then, the third component, commitment appears to tie the other two components together. Therefore, these three components create the vertices of a triangle.
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Sternberg's triangular theory of love is connected to the various types of adult attachment as described by Baumeister and Bushman. For instance, the numerous combinations of the components of Sternberg's model of love yield seven basic types of love (Sternberg, 1988). They include consummate, fatuous, compassionate, empty, romantic, infatuated and liking love. According to Sternberg's model of love, these components are responsible for the development of certain types of love. For instance, romantic love combines commitment with intimacy and passion.
Are specific types of attachment related to specific types of love?
I believe that specific types of attachment related to specific types of love. Psychologists agree that the way a specific form of love is manifested relates to the attachment and how people relate. According to psychologist John Bowlby, attachment refers to an emotional bond that affects one’s behavior (Sandberg et al. 2017). Therefore, how a person bonds with a caregiver in early childhood influences how the individual behaves in future relationships and how much the person will allow himself/herself to love others consciously. The early attachment style results in a particular model of attachment, which continues to shape a person’s interactions with others as the individual matures (Unger & De, 2014). Then, this predicts how the individual interacts with a romantic partner. Individuals with a secure attachment style are likely to maintain a healthy style of love in relationships. Such people do not fear intimacy or closeness. On the other hand, those with an insecure attachment style tend to avoid closeness with other people (Unger & De, 2014).
The theory of love influences how people react to their needs and how they go about to fulfill these needs. In a secure attachment style, an individual is self-imposed and confident and will thus easily love others; fulfilling not only his own but also others’ needs. Nevertheless, in an avoidant or anxious attachment style, an individual picks a partner who suits this maladaptive style (Unger & De, 2014). Therefore, the person will choose a partner who is not the suitable choice to make her/him happy in a relationship.
In a sense, people’s attachment styles affect everything ranging from the selection of a partner to how bad or well the relationship progresses and finally to how happy or sad it ends. For this reason, it is important for people to understand their attachment styles because it may help them understand their vulnerabilities and strengths in relationships.
Does research support a connection between the type of adult attachment and type of adult love?
There is adequate research indicating a connection between the type of adult attachment and type of adult love (Pines, 2004). For instance, it is easy for secure adults to get close to other people because such adults are less worried about being abandoned. Moreover, secure adults tend to be supportive towards their partners in spite of faults and their relationships are characterized by friendship, trust, and happiness. As such, their relationship lasts longer. On the other hand, avoidant adults invest less in their relationships and have high chances of exiting these relationships (Unger & De, 2014). In fact, some of them fearful while others tend to be dismissing. Emotional lows and highs characterize such forms of adult relationships. According to our course reading materials, these partners often engage in brief sexual encounters that lack love. As for the anxious adults, love seems to be an obsession. These people are fast in demanding reciprocation, are less trusting and are more jealous and possessive. To them, breaking up and making up with a partner, is a norm.
How psychology professional can use the research on attachment styles and types of love to help people prepare for success in couple relationships.
A psychology professional can apply the research on attachment styles and types of love to understand the development of relationship patterns and coping patterns in relationships (Unger & De, 2014). It will not only help individuals with high attachment avoidance and anxiety to adjust their ineffective coping strategies but also help them understand the unmet needs and learn better ways of meeting their emotional and psychological needs. Moreover, research in this area will help psychologists to understand that individuals with varying insecure attachment trends such as avoidance and anxiety might apply varying coping techniques to handle their relationship difficulties. Research recommends that these professionals may offer couples with counter-complimentary interventions to help them break old patterns (Pines, 2004). In the end, this may help couples prepare for success in their relationships.
Overall, social attachments are crucial to our happiness and serve to promote our survival as social creatures. Adult attachments and childhood attachments are characterized by caring, physical closeness, long-term commitment, and love. These attachment characteristics are crucial factors in shaping types of love and our patterns of relationships.
References
Pines, A. M. (2004). Adult attachment styles and their relationship to burnout: a preliminary, cross-cultural investigation. Work & Stress, 18, 1, 66-80.
Sandberg, J. G., Bradford, A. B., & Brown, A. P. (2017). Differentiating between attachment styles and behaviors and their association with marital quality. Family Process, 56, 2, 518-531.
Sternberg, R. J. (1988). The triangle of love: Intimacy, passion, commitment . New York: Basic Books.
Unger, J. A. M., & De, L. R. V. (2014). The relationship between childhood physical abuse and adult attachment styles. Journal of Family Violence, 29, 3, 223-234.
