Conflict occurs in every relationship, business or organization. It is inevitable because we are all individuals with different opinions, thoughts and preferences. Managing the changes that may arise are a major part of handling conflict. This process may be unsuccessful if a leader is unable to control their emotions. Anger in particular can derail leadership efforts and disgrace an otherwise capable leader.
A leader may derail his previous efforts if he gets angry at his followers. This is not to say that every lapse of judgment or deliberate mistake should be overlooked. Instead, a leader should avoid getting into verbal altercations with the person or persons responsible for the mistake. This is because a person who receives negative feedback in an aggressive way is more likely to distance themselves from their leader. The situation is made worse when the reprimand comes in the form of shouting while in the presence of clients or co workers. The responsible party is likely to develop a low self esteem and to hide future mistakes from discovery. The ideal situation would be to get angry about the mistake but express it to the person in a gentle manner (Wang et al., 2017).
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Accumulating anger is also detrimental to good leadership. This leads to an elevation of the feeling of anger. The leader then explodes at the followers even when the mistake is not as major as the reaction. This can be avoided by adressing each issue as it arises. To ensure that the anger is not elevated, expound on the issue to its detail. This will guarantee that the feelings of helplessness are eliminated by taking control of the situation. A repeat encounter may not result in a similar state of anger. Anger can derail leadership efforts if it is directed at the wrong person. Blaming someone for another person shortcomings will demoralize them. They may also be reluctant to submit to this same leadership in the future.
There are five discoveries in the Primal Leadership text. The first is the motivation to change. This can be described as the realization of where you want to be as compared to where you are. Changes are then made to reflect the ideal self that is visualized in the future. The second discovery is looking at your real self. This involves performing an honest self evaluation of ones strengths and weaknesses. This can then become the basis for honestly appraising ones abilities while managing the weaknesses. Incorporating opinions from multiple unbiased quarters will create the ideal balance of information and appraisal (Goleman et al., 2013).
The third discovery can be defined as learning leadership skills through the use of a practical plan. This discovery is dependent on the second one. After a leader has identified his strengths and weaknesses, he should develop a plan to hone his skills. This can be done by using their identified learning style to boost their strength. The same style will help manage shortcomings. The fourth discovery is experimenting. This is done by adapting ones habits and practices so that they can fit into daily practices and behaviours. The mental rehearsal technique is used to adapt positive habits while eliminating the negative. Practicing the habit deliberately can help one to become accustomed to the new action. With time, carrying out this action becomes automatic. The last discovery is developing supporting and trusting relationships. Fostering such positive relationships can be done through mentorship programs. It is also wise to maintain relationships with supportive friends and family. This will foster growth , learning and self improvement.
References
Goleman, D., Boyatzis, R. E., & McKee, A. (2013). Primal leadership: Unleashing the power of emotional intelligence . Harvard Business Press.
Wang, L., Restubog, S. L. D., Shao, B., Lu, V., & van Kleef, G. A. (2017). Does anger expression help or harm leader effectiveness? The role of competence-based versus integrity-based violations and abusive supervision. Academy of Management Journal , (ja).