Understanding Positions and Interests is the brief video prepared by the participants of the national technical assistance center for dispute resolution in special education – so-called CADRE. This video observes ways to realize the interests of other sides through development of better understanding of the positional negotiation. The negotiators discuss other, more friendly strategies for resolving conflicts. The goal of CADRE’s members is to persuade there are more efficient approaches than setting ultimatums. The conversation analyzes the phenomenon of position and explains how educational positions are different from self positions. The speakers move to the personal interests to explain how a conflict can be solved by involving interests of both sides. John Reiman and Anita Engiles try to point out how safety concerns and situational needs are different from personal positions. They justify claims based on someone’s safety or education. So, there is a vivid barrier between one’s whim (position) and interest (real need). Thus, it is crucial to find out the reason for the particular request before denying it and getting involved into the debate. The examples drawn in this video prove authors’ position. Another critical point is a theoretical model. It is also stressed that the best way to end up any conflict (or prevent it at all) is to find the compromise made of the both sides’ interests.
The next video I would like to briefly analyse is called Listening , and it is also established by CADRE. The key points covered here are three critical elements each good listener should possess. This video lesson explains how to focus on the message of another person; listen carefully and show sincere sympathy; and perform complete understanding or support. The authors point to the significance of personal values, culture, and preferred language. The video aims to develop effective listening skills. Several definitions of the process are offered in order to understand the word ‘listening’ in full. This video article mentions why efficient listening is an important element of any conversation or conflict resolution. It highlights the qualities a person must possess to deliver the message clearly. Except for the empathy between two speakers, the video highlights how important attentive listening is for our motivation. Attentiveness along with attending and responding skills are three key points covered in this short video.
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A Tale of Two Conversations is two interrelated videos with the edifying messages. A parent and administrator have to choose another approach to the speech therapy for her son. After watching what each individual did and said during the video, I have concluded that the communication was rather ineffective and the problem was not solved.
I have noticed a lot of interruptions from both sides. After watching the videos proposed by CADRE, I have realized that it’s impossible to be a good listener without involving two sets of skills: attending and responding. As for the attending skills, neither administrator nor Coby’s parent makes an attempt to demonstrate pure interest and care. Looks like the administrator is in a hurry. Her phone calls distract both speakers from the main point. The parent looks irritated. Her gestures are very nervous. They both lack open body postures and welcoming gestures.
Persuasion techniques used by the administrator are weak to calm down the uptight mother. She hears only what she wants to hear. She has not noticed any changes in her son’s behavior, so this mother does not trust administrator. But another woman is confident about her position as she has a report as an evidence of the child’s progress. The administrator is trying to jump over to other issues and ignores parent’s direct claim. This woman does not show too much interest, stressing it by secondary activities (playing with pen, knocking on the table). The lack of eye contact between two speakers can be noticed as well. The woman finally agrees that she hasn’t even seen Coby in action. When the parent moves to the question of money, it all turns in a sort of conflict. The tension between two women grows as each of them supports own position. As the result, no agreement on the extra speech therapy was ignored. The worst thing is that most probably the boy will suffer due to the inability of his parent and school administrator to reach a consensus.
The final video is called A Tale of Two Conversations: Take Two, which covers the same situation, but both sides involve a different approach now. Of course, the results are also different and more satisfying.
To begin with, the administrator looks more welcoming when the mother just enters the room. She tries to create a warm atmosphere instead of keeping indifferent. The parent in her turn does not seem that annoyed. She laughs and compliments the administrator. Hand gestures reflect the positive mood of each speaker. Direct eye contact is more powerful this time. The administrator took care of the problem by sharing materials much earlier so that the mother had enough times to go through. This time, a problem is explained much better.
Administrator shows a sincere interest and offers various solutions. So, she does not deny the fact Coby might need more intensive speech therapy. This time, this woman represents excellent responding skills by sometimes repeating the words of boy’s mother and asking relevant questions. This time the school administrator has understood the problem completely, and promises to find the best solution.