Children learn by observation, imitation, and play. As a result, external factors contribute significantly in their development path. For instance, one measure that differentiates children is their culture. These differences among children, impact their understanding of the world around them, their knowledge, and acceptable behaviour. I grew up in South Korea and America, two places with wildly different cultural practices. As a result, my childhood experiences were different from those of an American child, even those of South Korean descent. For instance, for most of my South Korean friends who were born and grew up in the US, the language they spoke at home varied from English to South Korean. Some of them did not know how to speak Korean. However, whenever I was home, I spoke in Korean because it was instilled in me early on. I can, therefore, claim that I am more connected to my identity than my friends based on different factors, but primarily because I speak fluent Korean. However, speaking Korean is not enough to make me equal to my peers back in South Korea. Compared to me, they are the true South Koreans.
Ethnic identity, therefore, is as subjective as it is a sense of belonging to a particular group or an imaginary community. When I claim to be a South Korean or when others use me as an example of a typical American child (mostly by other Korean families), the meaning goes deeper than identifying with the ethnic group. Since I grew up in two different places with different cultures, my ethnic identity changes internally (which group I identify with) and externally (from which lens are other people viewing me), hence the subjectivity. These statements involve conscious and unconscious processes that stem from a deep psychological need for identity and historical continuity. Ethnicity, therefore, might explain why cultural practices perpetuate from one generation to the next. For instance, my cultural background is greatly influenced by two things. First, the grade point average and the type of schools I have attended. Second, family matters and adherence to traditions. For instance, a child’s discipline reflects directly on their parents. If they lack discipline, then the parents will get in trouble first, followed by the child. Growing up, these cultural beliefs and practices influenced my identity, and I have learned to accept them as truths. No one had to explain them to the level of depth required to believe in them, yet I do. In the future, I might find myself, consciously or unconsciously passing them on to my children.
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Ethnicity, however, affects other aspects of my life beyond the sense of identity and belonging. To a child, ethnicity and culture form the basis for religious beliefs. Children are yet to develop the cognitive and intellectual capacity to think about religion. They are more likely to consciously choose one will be influenced by their ethnic and cultural background. For instance, my family and cultural background practice Confucianism. Furthermore, in South Korea, we believe in studying hard and playing hard. If I were spared from the influence of ethnicity and culture in my early childhood and given a choice after I graduated from high school, I might have believed in different things. Perhaps, school and my community (in both countries) would have played a major role in defining my identity other than family, ethnicity, and cultural background. Not everything worked well, however.
I was born with a learning disability, which is a bad thing for a child born in a family that prizes educational performance above all else. When I really got sick, my family members never understood and thought I was faking it, thus forced me to go to school. I was never able to live up to my parent’s educational standards, which hurt them and made me very guilty. Note that, my mom is a professor at University for Piano and my father, who now works at the university as a professor. Both of my parents were honour roll students with the grade point average of 4.50. My parents went to the top best university. My mom went to John Hopkins Peabody for her music while my father went to Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania. My three younger siblings were able to have a grade point average of 3.50 well, not me sorry to say.
Failing to understand the impact of my learning disability underscores one thing that should have been done differently. It shows that my family and by extension, my culture, did not understand the concept of a disability, especially in learning. In contrast, American culture understands and is built into consideration for people and children with disabilities. Curricula have been modified to cater to our needs. My parents, despite their high literacy level, failed to meet these needs, and it made for a difficult childhood. I am lucky, though, because I grew up in a school and community that met my other needs. It is too late for me, but here is what I will do differently for others. I will acknowledge that cultural beliefs should not be accepted blindly, especially when they fail to account for events and abilities (or disabilities), resulting in unmet needs. Not everyone should be judged with the standard benchmark. Educational expectations, for instance, should be different for each child depending on their different abilities.
