Parent use different approaches to parent their kids. The approaches are distinct because people have a distinct personality. It is public knowledge the personality influences the way people do things. It thus influences the way parent chose to parent their kids. The environment in which parents bring up their kids can also influence how they chose to parent. The can pick up different thing from their environment that can influence their personality and thus change the way they treat kids. They may learn from other parents or advice from professionals such as pediatricians and thus modify their approach to achieve the best possible results for their kids. Regardless, the parenting approach to parent transmits the parent values to the kids. This essay focuses on how authoritative parenting style works to realize parenting objectives.
Steinberg & Darling (2017) found that among the different styles or types of parenting, some are more superior to others as they produce better results for both the children and parents than the others. Research has categorized parenting into four distinct parenting styles which include hands-off, authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive. Psychologists and experts in the field of human development have confirmed that the most effective and successful parenting styles in bringing up children who are academically strong and stable emotionally to be authoritative style. Unfortunately, not every parent falls in this category, but most parents will exhibit characteristics of a combination of two or more parenting styles. Usually, some parents believe that if they can adopt the best practices from each parenting style, they will be more flexible and therefore, able to make adjustments whenever there is a need for that.
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Authoritative parenting approach of child upbringing combines sensitivity, warmth, and setting of rules, limits or boundaries. As a result, parents can apply reasoning as well as positive reinforcements to provide guidance and direction to their children. Since it is easy for parents to resort to punishments and threats hen parenting, authoritative style provides alternatives that help parents avoid punishing or threatening their children. The majority of parents who apply authoritative parenting style are usually from middle-class families who are educated and results in desirable child outcomes regardless of the culture it is applied.
According to Spera (2005), some of the benefits to children as a result of being brought up using the authoritative parenting styles include a sense of independence and freedom, good manners, being successful academically, strong self-esteem, social acceptance, and self-reliance. Such children are not likely to be victims of anxiety disorder, depression and are also less likely to engage in risky behaviors and antisocial behaviors such as drug abuse, alcoholism, and delinquency. Since parents might have different parenting styles, having one of the parents, mother or father who is authoritative has been proved to make a big difference in the upbringing of their children. When children are wrong or right, authoritative parents' find the time and try to reason out together with their children and explain the consequences of wrongdoing as well as good behaviors. To do this, parents usually encourage a verbal give-and-take.
The fundamental aspect of authoritative parents is that they refrain from using arbitrary or harsh punishments, withdrawal of love or shaming as a way of controlling their children. On the contrary, authoritative parenting styles reflect a balance of two important values in child rearing which are responsibility and freedom. Through this balance, authoritative parents can encourage their children to be independent in a mature and disciplined manner that they will be respectful to other people. Some researchers believe that authoritative parents are both very demanding and at the same time very responsive. Globally, there are a whole lot of authoritative parents. However, due to differences in cultures, there are several variations.
Some people think that authoritative parenting is about being democratic. Although in some way it reflects some democratic practices, it is not usually about promoting democracy. In the United States of America, authoritative parenting reflects some democratic acts such as considering the children's opinions and preferences during decision making in the family or motivating children to express own divergent perspectives. This explains why authoritative parenting works in America and fail to work in other cultures that do not believe in democracy (Spera, 2005). For instance, despite most Chinese and Russian parents being authoritative, they fail to consider their children's preferences while making family decisions and plans. They also fail to encourage their children to express their opinions especially when their opinions are likely to conflict with those of their parents. Nevertheless, just like in American parents exercising authoritative parenting, a common characteristic is evident among authoritative parents all over the world regardless of their culture- and that trait is the aspect of giving explanations or reasons for rules and talking with the children who are naughty. In a nutshell, authoritative parenting is the most effective parenting style that induces discipline and as a result lead to kind conscientious, helpful and more emphatic children than others.
Authoritative parenting helps kids not to develop defiant and aggressive behaviors. Due to its aspect of inducing discipline, authoritative parenting enhances the development of moral values. Every single component of authoritative parenting has its benefits. As earlier noted, explaining the reasons why rules are set and why they should be adhered to has proved to be instrumental in helping children more advanced moral reasoning. The research adds that authoritative parenting encourages secure attachments and help children avoid internalizing-related problems. Since authoritative parents discuss feelings and thoughts with their children, attachment relationships get strengthened making the babies become better mind readers. Authoritative parenting discourages parents to reprimand their children whenever they make intellectual mistakes. When parents avoid expressing their disappointments due to their children's mistakes, the children become better learners and problem-solvers. When parents allow their children to enjoy their freedom and independence, the children will become more self-reliant and have improved emotion health. Finally, children from authoritative families are more close to their parents and are hardly influenced by others (Spera, 2005).
If it can be possible for the whole of the American society to embrace authoritative parenting, then the benefits of the authoritative upbringing of children would be maximized since the society would be aligned along principles of authoritative parenting. In such a scenario, the school environment and other social environments provide a conducive environment for children to fit in comfortably. It's somehow difficult for a society to toe to the authoritative line. Therefore, it requires dedication regarding time, energy and self-control. For authoritative parents and those aspiring to become authoritative, it is always good to take occasional breaks. This should be guided by the principle that nobody is perfect and that the parenting journey has no roadmap. It would be bad to get annoyed of yourself when you become lenient.
Steinberg & Darling (2017) suggest that parents who wish to maximize the benefits of authoritative parenting should value their tough love, clarity, and their high expectations. It is always advisable that parents should remember that children do not understand their parent's strictness comes from love. While reasoning together with children, parents should make a point of being clear why things should be done in a certain manner. Authoritative parents must understand that there are different ways of expressing their love for their children without having to spoil them. This duality explains how parenting is complex.
There are reasons why authoritative parenting works in the United States of America. One, the country values democracy and authoritative parenting encompass some principles of democracy. Two, authoritative usually behave in the same way they expect their children to behave acting as their role models. Understanding rules and the importance to toe to the line enables children to become law-abiding citizens.
References
Spera, C. (2005). A review of the relationship between parenting practices, parenting styles, and adolescent school achievement. Educational psychology review, 17(2), 125-146.
Steinberg, L., & Darling, N. (2017). Parenting style as context: An integrative model. In Interpersonal Development (pp. 161-170). Routledge.