30 Sep 2022

102

The Perception of the Self: How We See Ourselves

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Self-concept entails how one perceives him- or herself in alignment with likes, relationships, traits, or roles. My concept is founded on socialization where I have managed to learn about myself since childhood. Interaction with family members has particularly been critical in informing who I am and what I can become. It is through honest family relations that I have come to know some of my traits and roles. Experience has also played a critical role in determining the relationships I engage in as well as likes and dislikes. However, cultural upbringing has set forth some rigid factors that determine one’s roles and relationships. Being a daughter or son is an aspect that one cannot deny. This further reinforces the notion of gendered roles where there are specific roles prescribed by culture as being solely for males while others are solely for women. In alignment with day to day life, I continue to learn more about myself by also interacting with larger social circles, outside family relations. 

Aspects that are Core to My Identity 

“ Relationships” is a major aspect that is critical to my identity. It defines who I am, not only in the family settings but also in the larger social context. The idea of being a woman is particularly critical as it offers a platform on which to define various relationships. For instance, being seen with an individual who is a male may attract various interpretations from those who see me. Some might say he is my brother while others may consider him my boyfriend or spouse. In the family context, the notion of being a woman gives me the concept of being a daughter and a sister. In this sense, daughterhood and sisterhood yield a sense of belonging, with the former being associated with my parents and the latter having associations with my siblings. This offers a clear definition of my basic relationships as part of self-concept. When it comes to the larger social context, I am currently a student and this forms part of my identity. In this light, I am a colleague to several other students with whom we attend the same institution. The basic relations here entail the interactions I have on day to day basis with those with whom we study a similar course. 

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Mechanisms through Which Various Aspects Became Part of My Identity 

The self-awareness theory is one of the mechanisms that have played a role in classifying some aspects as part of my identity. This theory is defined as the tendency to focus attention on oneself, a factor that leads other people to noticing the inadequacies of an individual thereby diverting the individual to behavioral change or defection from self-awareness (Duval & Silvia, 2002). My personal definition of the self-awareness theory embarks on what I have learned about myself by accepting corrections from my parents and other people who appeared positive in shaping me to an individual of high esteem. Having grown up in a family where role-sharing was common. I realized the difficulty of ever escaping from the notion of perceiving myself as a woman. Since childhood, I grew up knowing that there were aspects that defined one as a girl. This included the games I could engage in, the kind of play items that were offered to me, and the roles assigned in various games. 

In terms of family relations, I learned at a very early stage that a child who is born a girl is referred to as a sister by other siblings. I, therefore, integrated the notions of being a girl and sister and was further acculturated to the fact that I am a daughter to my father and mother. This trend of self-awareness is what I have relied on to define myself in various contexts. I am also aware that once I outgrow girlhood, the notion of womanhood comes in with various roles becoming evident just like is the case for my mother. The notion of gendered roles, again become highly articulated amidst clarity of the roles of a woman and man in the family and social context. In this light, I am aware that there are some roles which I should not engage in and which are specifically meant for men. Although times are changing and the new generation has traits that differ from the expectations of the society, acculturation still has its role in informing self-awareness (Australian Psychological Society, n.d.) as one is surrounded by people who could also be interested in one’s way of life, particularly as far as behavior is concerned. 

Self-enhancement is another mechanism that has played a critical role in boosting my identity as far as relationships are concerned. In alignment with it, I would say I feel good about being a woman and nothing can hinder me from promoting the traits associated with being a woman of importance to the society and those who matter most (Duval & Silvia, 2002). Though there is a common belief that there are traits that tend to present women as the weaker gender (Leuba, n.d), I maintain my self-esteem and confidently defend my womanhood when faced with situations that demand strength. 

Other’s Perception of Me 

During social interactions, there are times when people correctly or incorrectly present a definition of who they think or perceive me to be. One of the mechanisms I have experienced as far as other’s perception of me is concerned is the utilization of the fundamental attribution error. This is associated with the personalization of causes of a specific behavior rather than considering the situation under which such behavior occurs (Sherman, 2014). At one time when I lost my temper due to an occurrence in which the supervisor never seemed to understand why I did a mistake in the workplace. One of the managers attributed my loss of temper to the fact that I am a female. 

The self-fulfilling prophecies has also affected other people’s concept of me at some point. This is associated with someone’s belief of who someone is or can be and which manifests itself as true at some point (Beerman & Hedstrom, 2009). I remember one of my friends who always depicted the belief that I am a coward and cannot stand to address a crowd. She decided to confirm her belief by calling me to address a crowd during her birthday. Since I was not informed about the same, she mentioned my name and silenced others in a bid to have me give an impromptu speech. Since she had already told me at some point that I am incapable, I did not move forward and instead avoided everyone’s gaze as I maintained silence while seated with my head low. From this experience, my friend has always believed that I am a coward despite several other instances where I tried to prove her wrong. 

References  

Australian Psychological Society (n.d.). Why culture matters for children’s development and well-being. Retrieved from https://www.kidsmatter.edu.au/sites/default/ 

Bearman, P. & Hedstrom, P. (eds.) (2009). Self-fulfilling prophecies : The Oxford handbook of analytical sociology. Oxford: Oxford University Press. 

Duval, T. S. & Silvia, P. J. (2002). Self-awareness, probability of improvement, and the self-serving bias. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 82 (1), 49-61. Doi: 10.1037//0022-3514-82.1.49. 

Leuba, J. H. (n.d.). The weaker sex: A scientific ramble. The Atlantic. Retrieved from https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/ 

Sherman, M. (2014). Why we don’t give each other a break. Psychology Today. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/ 

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StudyBounty. (2023, September 16). The Perception of the Self: How We See Ourselves.
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