I interviewed Pamela (Pseudo name) a young woman aged 25 years from Nigeria. Pamela lives in Abuja, the capital city of Nigeria. From the interview, Nigeria is rich in cultural heritage. Our beginning point was matters to do with family and marriage. From their culture family units are very important and they are the building blocks of their society. Most of them live as extended families rather than nuclear families. Children are very much valued in families and I found it saddening that women who cannot bear children because of fertility problems and other issues are mocked and considered as unimportant to the community. . When the children get to an age of five to six years, they are introduced into performing some of the light household chores such as washing dishes and fetching firewood for girls and looking after cattle for boys. They believe that by doing this, the children will end up becoming productive members of the community. Laziness is tolerated at all in the society, everybody is expected to work.
Pamela was able to give me a detailed insight into marriage from her culture. In Nigeria, there are three types of marriage as of today, that is, traditional, religious and civil marriages. Religious marriages can either be Muslim or Christian and are done according to the teachings of the religions. Civil marriages are conducted by a government officer from the attorney general’s office. Traditional marriage is conducted at the compound of the wife's family and done in line with customs. In traditional marriages, the men are allowed to marry more than one wife. From her statements, most Nigerians consider polygamy advantageous over monogamy. However from Pamela’s point of view, polygamy causes division in families because of conflicts between the wives which in turn flows into the children as is the case with her family. On courtship, traditional values play a major part and as a very strong impact for both the common and elite members of this society. According to tradition, women do not have much choice when it comes to choice of a marriage partner. However, with changing times and the introduction of the western ways of doing things, this practice is continually changing. It was shocking to learn from the interview that some girls get married during their teen years and in most cases to elderly men who already have one or more wives. In such a case, the first wife assumes the duty of looking after the new wife and has her integrated into the family. O ffering bride price to the family of the intended wife is part of this culture. The bride price is considered as compensation which a man has to pay in order to marry a girl. This bride price can is usually in form of money, cattle or other items as requested by the bride’s family. It was interesting to learn that in some cases, a man may pay school fees for the intended wife if she is still in school or help her open a smack business and this is usually a part of wooing the girl. Divorce is not acceptable in this culture and women are encouraged to stick to their marriages and make things work out with their husbands. When the husband treats his wife well, the bride price returned in some cases.
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In this culture, inheritance is for the males only. Despite the fact that women are legally allowed to inherit in Nigeria, they rarely get anything. While a husband is still alive, it is the duty of the wife to provide for herself and her children. Upon the death of the husband, all the wealth and any property is inherited by the man’s sons if they are old enough to inherit or passed on to the man’s brothers and other relatives. The wife to the deceased man is also inherited by his brother or she goes back to her family.
Etiquette is a value that is highly regarded in this culture especially towards the elderly. Age is very much respected in this society. Life expectancy is not high in this community and those who make it to their senior years whether men or women earn a lot of respect and are admired by the others. Greeting one another is considered very important and also a sigh of respect and care. The greetings comprise of a firm handshake and well wishes. This is always the case when meeting somebody anywhere regardless of whatever they are doing. Anyone who does no practice this kind of greeting is seen rude and disrespectful. It is considered a taboo to shake hands or pass something to another person using the left hand ( Olaore and Drolet, 2016) . It is believed that the left hand is dirty and should never be used while addressing other people.
Apart from Christianity and Muslim religions, Nigerians also practice traditional religions too with traditional rituals and worshipping of gods and spirits. The spirits worshipped are believed to control certain aspects of nature. The places where these spirits have influence and dominance are considered to be holy and therefore human beings have to view the place as sacred and treat it as a sacred place. The sacred place can be a river, mountain, hill, a part of a forest, pond etc depending with its area of control. They believe that the spirits are divided into two, the good spirits and the evil spirits. The good spirits cause good things and are consulted by mediums and community leaders on issues of concern to the community. The bad spirits are believed to cause harm to the community and are feared by the community members. From Pamela’s explanation, the evil spirits work together with witches to cause destruction and death to the community ( Olaore and Drolet, 2016) .
From the interview with Pamela, Nigerians of all religious beliefs believe in death and life and after death. Nigerians of Christian and Muslim affiliations believe that upon dying, the spirit of the deceased person is judged by God and according to the person’s deeds while living on earth either goes to heaven or hell. However, the traditional religion does not believe in heaven or hell. They believe in reincarnation. They believe that at one point in life, the dead person comes back as a member of the family. Many rituals and ceremonies are performed to prepare the body for burial and for the appropriate send off. During the interview, the respondent explained that if the proper and correct rituals are not performed, the deceased’s spirit may come back to disturb them due to anger. That is why it is crucial that all the rituals are performed during the burial process. The interviewee gave a case of where they buried a relative and one of the rituals omitted. The spirit of the deceased person would attack them at night while asleep and whip them. To appease the angry spirit, they carried out some other rituals that involved slaughtering of an oxen and pouring libations. If the deceased person had some form of disability, some practices are carried out to ensure that the disability is not inherited along the family line ( Olaore and Drolet, 2016) . For example, a barren woman’s stomach is split open or some special leaves put on a blind man’s eyes before burial.
From the interview, circumcision is also considered a very important rite of passage in Pamela’s culture. In Nigerian culture, boys are mostly circumcised at the age of eight to forty days. Despite the fact that the practice is done due to cultural and religious reasons, it is mostly carried out by medical practitioners. A few of them are carried out by traditional practitioners. The interviewee also added that, the circumcision is not only for boys only but for girls too. In the past, Female Genital Mutilation was so rampant in the past and acceptable but it has decreased lately. Most of the girls are usually forced to undergo the process against their will by their parents as Pamela explained. However, some of the girls do it willingly too because they want to follow into the footsteps of their mothers and aunties who have undergone through it. Of late, it is a practice that is being discouraged in this culture due to deaths associated to it and other health issues ( Olaore and Drolet, 2016) . It is believed that the bloodshed during circumcision unites the individual with their ancestors.
I appreciate Pamela’s culture and a like some aspects of the culture which are positive, uphold human dignity, has respect for human rights and contribute to the well being of the individuals and their community. However, there are some aspects of the culture that shocked me. This is especially so with such as the ones that involve splitting open of the dead body of a barren woman and killing of twins because they are considered a bad omen to those who still hold to such traditional beliefs. I’m of the view that any cultural practice should contribute to well being and not cause harm. On the other hand, there are some cultural practices that I liked from Pamela’s culture ( Olaore and Drolet, 2016) . For example, value placed on children, practice of bride price and communal responsibility.
Comparing Pamela’s culture and mine, I noticed some similarities and differences in both cultures. The similarities include the practice of male circumcision, respect for the elderly and value for children. However there are some differences such as female genital mutilation and rituals meant for preventing the continuation of disability in the lineage. I have learnt that cultures vary among different communities but there is always that one aspect that ends up being common to almost every culture. It is therefore important not to judge each other’s culture because at one point there will always that one aspect that one may not like. From the interview, I have come to know that culture defines who we are and we should uphold the aspects of our cultures that contribute to the well being of the society.
Reference
Olaore, A. Y., & Drolet, J. (2016). Indigenous knowledge, beliefs, and cultural practices for children and families in Nigeria. Journal of Ethnic & Cultural Diversity in Social Work, 26 (3), 254 270.doi:10.1080/15313204.2016.1241973.
