Parenting is perhaps the most fundamental way of establishing the future society. It is without doubt that the characteristics of current and past generations have been molded by the general norms of parenting of their respective eras. Psychologists today presents four major styles of parenting, i.e. permissive, authoritarian, and authoritative and neglectful. Each of these parenting styles presents their own unique characteristics as well as underlying consequences. This paper, however, aims to evaluate two methods, authoritative and permissive, and provide a clear guideline on their individual consequences on children.
Authoritative parenting is regarded as the most beneficial and effective form of upbringing by many psychologists. To begin with, a household that is authoritative portrays the mechanics of society and life to children from a very tender age. Authoritative parents are characterized by having high expectations that have consequences in case they are not realized while at the same time being fairly understandable and reasonable to their children’s wishes. Thus Authoritative parenting encompasses clear set of rules and expectations that are both realistic and have penalties and open communication (Cherry, 2016).
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Authoritative parenting distinguishes from authoritarian parenting in a variety of ways. First and foremost, in authoritative parenting, there is open communication between the parent and the child. In the case authoritative parenting, both parents and children can express their views regarding their expectations and how to achieve them. Whereas in an authoritarian household, the word of the parent is law thus children have no say whatsoever and they must blindly follow the rules set out or face severe punishment, however aghast as it may seem. Thus authoritative parenting helps to build a better parent-child relationship while ensuring the parent still has control.
Nevertheless, authoritative parenting has been attributed to various to positive consequences. Well, the results may differ with the personality of the child in question and also the extent at which the parent stresses the consequences. The style nonetheless seems to result in children who are well behaved, resourceful, independent, law-abiding and socially acceptable. This is due to the warmth of the method that allows kids to express their feelings thereby negating the possibility of them lashing out either openly or indirectly such as the use of drugs (Cherry, 2016). However, as mentioned earlier, the consequences depend highly on how the parent-child relationship is built through the developmental phases of the child. Moreover, children from authoritative households are more likely to turn to their parents for advice when confronted with challenging situations rather than rely on peers.
Furthermore, permissive parenting is close yet far from the ideals that are presented in authoritative parenting- an oxymoron. Also known as indulgent parenting, this approach is potentially harmful. Here, parents are responsive but then again they are not demanding as they fear confrontation. Hence it is characterized by loving, caring and nurturing parents, however; there exist minimal rules whose implementation is exceedingly consistent (Cherry, 2016). There is a lack of structure of the relationship between the parent and child. Many parents who practice this style of parenting often do it as a result of fear of the extreme authoritarian approach. This may be as a result of being raised in authoritarian households or due to situations where the child is held dearly i.e. in the case of divorce.
The consequences of permissive parenting mainly lie on the negative side. Some of which include lack of self-control and self-discipline due to the lack of retribution as the children grow up. Cherry (2016) articulates that in a permissive household, parents are very lenient in such a way that they can get away with just about anything. Therefore, it can be perceived that children have control in such a relationship. This could lead to legal, societal and academic problems in the long run. Most children often clash with authority as they are raised to believe that their actions have little or no consequences no matter the vileness. In most cases, persons in authority and law enforcement officers do not react lightly. Moreover, children tend to have a problem when it comes to mingling with their peers as they are seemingly self-centered hence lack the admired virtues such as kindness and selflessness. Academically, children in permissive households are disadvantaged as they mostly rely on incentives to perform well in their academics. Thus they possess no desire to involve themselves academically when the incentives are withdrawn as is the case in college (Cherry, 2016).
In conclusion, both the two parenting styles have their own set of ideals and the way they are articulated. To the normal eye, authoritative parenting seems to be the better alternative as it empower children with skills ready to take on the world. Nonetheless, children, as well as parents, have extremely diverse personalities that will determine the parenting approach to be applied. It should be noted that parenting is not limited to these two approaches, i.e. authoritative and permissive parenting styles. Also, one should note that excellence parenting styles can be achieved when all these parenting styles are blended together. Proper parenting outlines the future of tomorrow's generation hence apt parenting styles dependent on the situation should be necessitated.
References
Cherry, K. (2016). Parenting Styles: What They Are and Why They Matter- The 4 Styles of Parenting . Retrieved from https://www.verywell.com/parenting-styles-2795072.
