Friendship remains among the only interpersonal relationship that everyone gets to experience at least once in a lifetime. Everywhere we go, we meet new people with whom we develop a connection that turns into a strong bond where we enjoy each other’s company without any formalities. Friendship can occur between people from the same gender or between a man and a woman. In amity, transparency is the most critical factor that keeps it stable for a very long time. A friend should offer guidance and give appropriate advice on matters relating to life. The whole acquaintance revolves around trust, and it should not be one-sided; it is a give and takes situation. Friendship is all about being there for one another in times of need and times of joy. Most of the times the bond gets too strong that no words are required to heal a moment, just the presence of that one treasured friend would be enough for a broken heart. I have many friends, but I particularly have one close friend who has been with me since third grade. I have always wanted to know how we bond effortlessly and how we have managed to stay strong over the years; to understand why my other affiliations failed. Strong bonds can get created through listening and understanding people’s needs and circumstances before reacting to people and situations.
There are various types of friendships that every human experience in their lifetime. There is a friendship of reciprocity which is characterised by honesty, generosity, self-sacrifice and mutual affection. Both friends benefit from the relationship ( Bannister&Fransella, 2019) . The second type can be termed as an acquaintance of receptivity, where one person is the primary giver while the other is the receiver. There is a positive imbalance in the one who gives and one who receives the affection, and it occurs mostly between people with a different status, for instance, a teacher and a student. Another type of amity is that of association, sometimes termed as a close affiliation( Bannister &Fransella, 2019) . These are the type of connection that one develops with workmates, classmates or neighbours. Many theories explain the concept of friendship and its origin in a person’s life.
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In friendship, it is typical to find characters that have common interests blending faster than those with nothing to relate. Rarely do people take time to choose friends on a character basis they find themselves blending. Kelly’s personal construct theory can be used to determine how various people end up together ( Kelly, 2003) . The theory suggests that people create personal constructs about how the universe works and they apply those constructs to make sense of their experiences and observations. On the other hand, the commonality theorem suggests that people form relationships based on a similar system of thoughts rather than physical appearances and attitudinal similarity( Kelly, 2003) . The sociability theory strengthens this concept by stating that through interaction, people get to understand each other’s way of thinking, which enables people to develop connections that grow and develop to form friendships( Bannister &Fransella, 2019) . In friendship we choose an individual that we feel can and will help support our personality; thus we look for similarity in construct system rather than physical form and attitudinal fascination, then develop a comprehension of that persons construct through social relations.
Knowing about friendship and interpersonal communication differs from mastering the proficiencies necessary to conduct social interaction in amity. There are various approaches available for skill development and instruction in interpersonal communication where some are theory, whereas others can get implemented ( Hargie, 2016) . Convectional researchers like Stevenson divided the two methods into two models known as the Management Model and the Knowing model( Bannister &Fransella, 2019) . The knowing model revolves around didactic principles which state that individuals who know much about communication principles, concepts and skills can implicate the same in their daily lives. The management model bases its pedagogical doctrines within some components which are; knowing about the academic sense; having analytic skills that help in critical thinking; behavioural abilities that focus on message construction and discernment; and skills at methodically structured change( Hargie, 2016) . The management model is more practical in real life as compared to the knowledge model. According to this approach, interpersonal communication consists of message construction and adaptive skills, which cause one to critically think about the needs and welfare of the situation and the individual. The skill is essential for people seeking to develop long term friendships.
Communicators must have listening and perceiving skills to adapt to situations and individuals. They should be able to practically assess the situation to determine what information about the other person in that situation are appropriate to utter. In a healthy friendship, the complexity of the case, and that of the other person must be observed( Hargie, 2016) . One needs to develop a comprehension of interpersonal contact systems and affiliations( Kelly, 2003) . The most vital part of the management model is the learning to learnability which fosters for interpersonal changes. It allows one to learn and grow from situations that come in their lives; for instance, you may unknowingly say something that offends the other. You automatically learn that they despise that word, topic or character.
Conflict is an inevitable part of social affiliations, and to some extent, it is healthy. There are very few affiliations that can get exempted from conflicts which occur when the two individuals differ in their point of view, goals, theories, interests and belief systems. In all my friendships, I have experienced some misunderstanding from time to time, and I have learnt the source of the conflict does not always matter it is how one handles the situation that matters( Bannister &Fransella, 2019) . While some are experts who have a comprehensive understanding of the interpersonal skill, thus know how to avert the situation, others like me have always conventionally handled these situations. When in conflict with someone you genuinely treasure, you can approach the case in many ways. Some people choose to sit and express their minds and resolve the matter while others keep the hurt to themselves. The type conflict in the latter situation is the covert conflict, and it destroys many friendships since the parties refuse to settle the indifferences which pile up and overwhelm the individuals( Hargie, 2016) . People perceive conflict as a negative occurrence, but it does help in strengthening friendship as every conflict resolved brings the two souls closer.
This research has empowered me in terms of interpersonal relations related to friendships. I intend to use whatever I have learned in my daily life. Through the study, I have understood why amity goes wrong sometimes. I plan to apply the interpersonal models, especially the management model, which requires one to be sensitive when handling other people. Before the study, I would find myself disagreeing a lot with most of my friends sometimes they get angry over things I say and go for days without talking to me. I always thought they were petty, but now I understand what goes wrong. I rarely consider their feelings or situations when I make my remarks. I fail to critically analyse my statement to determine if it fits the context and the person I am addressing. Although these situations are rare, they sometimes leave unrepairable damage to others. I will use the models of interpersonal communication to improve all my friendships. Although conflicts are unavoidable, I will do my best to use the skills gained in this class and in the preparation of this paper to resolve them better.
I want to mainly focus on my reciprocate friendships, where we are always there for each other. I have one person whom I can call my best friend, and we have known each other since third grade. We have been through tough times together, fought, celebrated good times and even cried together. We meet each other at a young age, and the bond strengthened itself all along. We never knew how to solve conflicts, or how to handle each other, but through interaction, we learned each other’s cognitive construct, and soon enough, we were doing everything together. As we are growing older, things are becoming more complex as we now have to help each other make some life-changing decisions. There was a time my friend planned to elope with her lover, and I did not know how to approach the situation without crushing her. Using the various models of interpersonal communication, I know I will communicate better with her minding about her sensitive side. Through the management model of approaching a person and situation, I will know the right words to use when correcting her. I will no longer live in the preliminary world of trial and error at the expense of other people’s feelings.
The art of friendship remains one of the most underrated skills that one can possess. Although almost everybody has a friend, very few people have mastered the art of communicating with other beings. Anybody seeking to create a lasting bond such as friendship needs to understand the essentials of interpersonal communication, as illustrated in most theories. Human beings are sensitive creatures that need to be handled with ultimate care. Before remarking, one has to follow the management model, which requires one to critically think about the person and the situation and use this information to utter the appropriate words. Interpersonal communication education is essential for every person since it will better social interactions and help avert unnecessary conflicts.
References
Bannister, D., &Fransella, F. (2019). Inquiring man: The psychology of personal constructs . Routledge.
Kelly, G. (2003). The psychology of personal constructs: Volume two: Clinical diagnosis and psychotherapy . Routledge.
Hargie, O. (2016). Skilled interpersonal communication: Research, theory and practice . Routledge.
