The article addresses highlights that technology and media can promote intimacy in various ways, but it also has a polarizing impact on relationships. Today, the root of romance is based on love, but in the past, this was not the case. In earlier times, people paid attention to business matters such as ways of joining certain kingdoms and hence love was secondary. Things have changed and today love is considered to be the only thing that matters. However, this is an overemphasis which is promoted by the media which highlight stories, films, songs and books that stress that love conquers everything and consequently it is fulfilling and it brings prosperity and happiness. The media portrays love to be more desirable yet, in reality, such things do not happen. Nevertheless, people ought to differentiate between over-romanticized love and a healthy and realistic love. Additionally, in the contemporary society, the expectations of sexuality have changed due to media such as social platforms, chat rooms, online dating, and pornography. The impacts of media and technology in aiding intimacy will be examined using the social exchange theory.
I believe that the media and technology do not aid intimacy and the social exchange theory will examine this claim. The social exchange theory concentrates on the relationship outcomes. The theory argues that partners contemplate on the rewards (positive outcomes) and costs (negative outcomes) of the relationships ( Schaufeli, 2006, p.75) . The rewards comprise of both social and material rewards whereas costs comprise of opportunity costs ( Cook et.al, 2013, p.61) . Based on this theory, people examine their relation from a rewards and costs perspective. The theory postulates that the two parties provide and receive items that are of value to each other. According to this theory, they will likely continue with the relationship if both individuals feel that there is a satisfactory benefit that is acquired from the relationship. Costs and rewards are critical concepts that form the foundation of the social exchange theory. The media and technology do not come into play when people are conducting a cost-benefit analysis of relationships and thus non-factors in intimacy.
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For instance, Bridgette is trying to make a decision between two potential suitors. Bridgette performs a cost-benefit analysis to determine the value of both potential relationships by deducting the observed costs from the observed benefits. Bridgette selects the suitor who has the best result which happens to be John. She may dislike John’s lack of money and his quick temper, but Bridgette feels that the benefits (John is handsome, caring and exciting) outweigh the costs .
People use the cost-benefit analysis at the initial stages of the relationship to assist them to decide if they want to start it. Additionally, people also use the cost-benefit analysis in deciding whether to continue the relationship or not ( Schaufeli, 2006, p.75) . Comparing the expectations of the relationship is grounded in the past experiences. Essentially, people compare the benefits and costs of the current relationship compared to the benefits and costs of past relationships. People are different and hence others have a high comparison level and anticipate a high volume of rewards ( Liao et.al, 2010, p.1090) . The media and technology do not have any place in such circumstances and thus non-influential to intimacy.
For instance, Bridgette has been having rewarding relations with past boyfriends who treat her well and also pay a lot of attention. Therefore she will expect that the relationship with John will also be similar. If John fails to fulfill her expectations we predict that she will rethink the idea of dating him. Nonetheless, if another woman comes in john’s life and she has low comparison level compared to Bridgette, the probability of her being happy in the same relationship will be high because she does not have high expectations.
Therefore taking into account the principles of social exchange, media and technology do not have a huge impact on romance. Social exchange theory is a crucial framework for understanding sexuality in the modern society ( Chiu et.al, 2006, p.1872) . Applying the basis of the theory in a romantic relationship means that sex in the community has been viewed as a valuable commodity given to men in exchange for other rewards. Rewards for sexual intimacy can be in various forms such as love, respect, commitment or commodities of monetary value ( Schaufeli, 2006, p.75) . Sex is the primary resource of women and hence they can maintain the high price while men would aim at lowering the price. In the contemporary society, these factors are considered before people engage in an intimate relationship, and this proves that media and technology do not have an impact on intimacy.
In conclusion, media and technology have been influential avenues in people’s lives in various ways. However, they do not have an impact on intimacy as revealed by the social exchange theory. This topic is a controversial issue in the society. However, people are aware that most of the things portrayed in media do not happen in reality. The subject of media, technology and intimacy are important concepts that people should be aware of as they are widely publicized. The social exchange theory is a vital model that highlights how intimacy works in relationships. People utilize the costs-benefits analysis in examining whether to initiate or continue a relationship. Past experiences have also been linked to being part of the factors considered by people when deciding about intimate relationships.
References
Chiu, C. M., Hsu, M. H., & Wang, E. T. (2006). Understanding knowledge sharing in virtual communities: An integration of social capital and social cognitive theories. Decision support systems , 42 (3), 1872-1888.
Cook, K. S., Cheshire, C., Rice, E. R., & Nakagawa, S. (2013). Social exchange theory. In Handbook of social psychology (pp. 61-88). Springer Netherlands.
Liao, H., Liu, D., & Loi, R. (2010). Looking at both sides of the social exchange coin: A social cognitive perspective on the joint effects of relationship quality and differentiation on creativity. Academy of Management Journal , 53 (5), 1090-1109.
Schaufeli, W. B. (2006). The balance of give and take: Toward a social exchange model of burnout. Revue internationale de psychologie sociale , 19 (1), 75-119.
