Heartbreak is hard for anyone. It is even harder when one has been in a relationship for over five years. Most men continue to show up and look for their ex-girlfriends months after the relationship has ended. The girl may end up putting a restraining order on her ‘ex’ if he continues to show up on her. Some men are not frightened by the thought of a restraining order being put on them. They will go to very high heights in the bid to try to get their love back. Others would not go beyond that point. There is a belief that letting one free is a strong gesture of love. There is a possibility that something would come back if it is set free. In “The Cheater’s Guide to Love,” Yunior decides to live his ex-girlfriend alone and moves to Boston in the hope that by doing so, things would get better and they may end up together again. This comes after his ex-girlfriend’s sister tells him, “For some negroes that would mean shit. But you ain’t that kind of Negro.” The story presents forth the ideology and saying that loving something means letting it free. Also, it presents the ideology that it is noble to let someone free rather than deny them space. The paper will analyze the quote, “For some negroes that would mean shit. But you ain’t that kind of Negro” to bring out certain aspects of love from Junot Diaz’s, “The Cheater’s Guide to Love.”
The younger sister to Yunior’s ex-girlfriend has been on his side throughout. She has admired him and known him to be a good man. Even after learning of his mistakes, she still believed that he was a good person. She tells him that he is not the kind of a guy for who would not be scared by the thought of restraining order being out on him. She knows that Yunior would not go to that extent. He is not a violent person. He actually leaves New York for Boston and never returns. He proves her point.
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It is expected that a good person, as in the case of Yunior, would not do the things he did to his girlfriend. Love also counts as a measure for good. If he were surely a good person, he would not cheat on his girlfriend and in such a rate. According to the story, Yunior had been cheating right from the time the two of them became a couple. In six years, he had been in sexual relationships with fifty other women. His girlfriend probably never cheated on him even ones. Yunior’s cheating rates disqualifies him as a good person. The point presented through the quote in the story is thus contradictory. While Yunior shows his nobility by leaving the ex-girlfriend alone and moving to Boston, his multiple affairs do not display any sense of nobility in him. Love comes with respect. If a person loves another, then he or she must respect that person, which shows the nobility in the person. Cheating of that extent means Yunior did not respect his girlfriend.
The ex-girlfriend probably realized how much Yunior disrespected her. What he did was not an act of love or respect. He had no reason to stay around and bother her after she found out and ended the relationship. If he did not love and respect her, then, he could not do the same at that moment as well. She, therefore, decided to lock him out of her life for good. She would have put a restraining order on him if he continued to stay and bother her. The ex-girlfriend’s sister actually saved him the trouble of having to stay and be handed the restraining order. That would have been shameful on his part.
The old saying that loving something means letting free is applied all the time by people seeking to save their love life. The quote “For some negroes that would mean shit. But you ain’t that kind of Negro” presents this ideology. After Yunior’s ex-girlfriend’s sister says this to him, he stops bothering his ex-girlfriend and leaves. Two different aspects of Yunior come out of this. He is seen as a nonviolent individual and also as a smart person. He is smart enough to realize that it is better to leave before receiving a restraining order. Yunior is also smart in the sense that he was able to realize that leaving his ‘ex’ alone was a good idea for both of them. He hoped that by doing so, she would come around and let him back, which does not happen. After he goes to Boston, he never sees her again. His life becomes a nightmare. He gets into relationships with other women who do not match up to his ex-girlfriend. By setting his ‘ex’ free, he loses her forever. On the good side, this action presents her with the chance to rebuild and concentrate on her life. The fact that she does not come around also implies that he did not deserve her and that they were never meant for each other. A girl with such a good heart was not meant for a man with such unfaithful tendencies.
Conclusion
Certain aspects of love appear in Junot Diaz’s story, ‘The Cheater’s Guide to Love.’ Love goes hand in hand with respect for one’s partner. ‘Cheaters’ such as Yunior do not deserve to have true love, according to the story. The quote “For some negroes that would mean shit. But you ain’t that kind of Negro,” implies that Yunior is either or both a noble and a smart person. He does not go to the extent of having a restraining order put on him. But his cheating habits do not suggest his nobility. He is smart and embraces the belief that letting his ‘ex’ free would ultimately bring her back to him, which does not happen as he spends five years trying to get over her. The fact that the ex-girlfriend does not come around suggests that they were never meant to be together in the first place and that Yunior did not deserve her. Yunior would then spend years trying to understand love through his struggles and mistakes.
