Human sexuality, for decades, has been the center of studies in major learning institutions. Many people fail to understand what sex is; a considerable majority of people have always assumed that sexuality is only about sexual intercourse; however, this perception might not be far from the truth. Thus, sexuality is about human beings, sexual feelings, thoughts, attractions, and behaviors towards people, known or unknown (Cohen, 2016). Finding other people physically, sexually, or emotionally attractive defines someone's sexuality. Naturally, sexuality is diverse and natural; as such, discovering your sexuality as a person is liberating, exciting, and, most of all, gives one a chance of being sexually satisfied. It is, therefore essential, to share out and discuss your sexuality to clear self-doubts or discrimination from other people.
When discussing sexuality, it is important to note that men and women are different. To understand the difference in human sexuality, it is equally vital to know the types of sexuality. Heterosexuality and homosexuality are types of sexuality; a heterosexual is a person who is sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex, otherwise known as straight. While homosexual is a person who is sexually attracted to people of the same sex, otherwise known as gays for men, and lesbians for women, bisexuality is another type of sexuality; a bisexual person is sexually attracted to both men and women; however, bisexual people differ in one way or the other, for instance, some gays are more attracted to fellow gays than women, while some lesbians are more attracted to fellow lesbians more than men. Asexuality is another type of sexuality; this is a person who does not experience or experiences little sexual attractions, asexuality is also a sexual orientation just like homosexuality; however, asexual people feel an appeal to another person when there is a strong emotional bond.
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According to Symons (1981), the sexual orientation of women to men differs. Most men are very definite when it comes to choosing their sexual partners; they are either homosexual or heterosexual. Male sexual satisfaction is not the same as that of women; hence, they are less likely to switch their sexual orientation. They seem to understand their sexual orientation, and as such are more decided than women. On the other hand, women seem to be confused about their sexual orientation; their sexual satisfaction is beyond their power to some extent, as such, women are sexually diverse, and are attracted to men and fellow women (Symons, 1981).
Compared to women, men use more pornographic content than women; they also tend to masturbate and feel sexual desire more than women (Cohen, 2016). This might be due to some reasons, from an evolutionary perspective, men tend to satisfy their sexual desire by themselves, to orgasm more frequently, a phenomenon that aims at helping in the reproduction process. Women, however, do not need to have orgasms to procreate; men's hormones play a massive role in the reproduction process, as such, arousal hormones in men differ from that of women (Cohen, 2016). Socially, masturbation has always been considered immoral and a taboo to many communities, especially in Africa. It is, therefore, more of a social problem when women engage in it.
Sexual turn-ons also vary with gender differences. Women's sexual drive is more complicated than men's; most men, especially the straight men, tend to be turned by depictions of male-female sex and female-female sex; gay men likewise tend to be turned on by male-male sex. Straight women also get turned on by male-female sex (Buss, 2010); however, most of the women also show the reaction to male-male sex and female-female sex. This means that women are more likely to be bisexual, they can emotionally and physically get attracted to fellow women, as much as it is a natural phenomenon, they seem not to understand their sexual orientation, in most cases, they tend to misinterpret their sexual orientation as a disorder. On the other hand, men are more rigid and specific on who they get aroused too, or what turns them on. For instance, a straight man would never feel sexually aroused when provoked by a fellow man unless in the case he is bisexual.
Sexual drives between men and women also vary under the influence of cultural and social factors or behaviors (Buss, 2010). For instance, women's attitude towards engaging in a sexual act is different from that of men; women tend to hold back the desire to participate in sexual activity because they do not like their sexual partners, while men, when aroused, rarely consider their sexual partners.
Women who also attend church are also less likely to be permissive towards sexual acts; this is because they hold their biblical values sacred, and as such, most would object sexual acts at least for the period they are not married. Women also are more likely to be inconsistent in their sexual lives as compared to men; thus, most of them are more likely to engage in premarital sex more than men.
Another sexual difference is that men tend to think more about sex than women; generally, men are sexually active than women, it's estimated that a man thinks of sex more than once a day, while a woman can go for a couple of days without thinking about sex, or even engaging in the sexual act ( Wiederman, 2001) . While sexual fantasies decrease with age among adults, men tend to be more sexually stronger than women at an older age, at that time; men will still think or fantasize about sex, this explains why men want sex every time, at the beginning of a relationship, at the middles of it and after many years into old age, their sexual desire increases ( Wiederman, 2001) .
Gay men also sexually think more about sex than lesbians; hence, they are more likely to use pornographic content in the case they feel to meet their sexual partners. Men also want more sexual partners than women, thus, would go the extra mile of involving a commercial sex worker, this explains why in the prostitution business, women are more than men since most men need sexual satisfaction than women.
The path to satisfying sexual desires also differs. Women are more interested in getting attached to their partner; it is more than fulfilling their sexual urge ( Bergner, 2013) . Unlike men, women prefer engaging in sexual talks; create the feeling of getting sexually committed to their partner, women want emotional attraction before giving out their bodies. Men, on the other hand, do not need any catalyst towards getting aroused; mere nudity of their sexual partner gets them into the sexual mood. This is why women will take much longer during courtship; they want to emotionally attach themselves to their partner, which makes them feel appreciated when giving in to sexual satisfaction.
Choosing a sexual partner also differ between both genders. Women always look at the future of a relationship; every woman wants a long-lasting relationship that is beyond sexual satisfaction, before getting into a relationship, for instance, a woman wants a man that can stand up to his responsibilities in case a child is sired in the course of the relationship; most women would love to be in a family than being single mothers, hence, choosing a sexual partner is complex. Men, on the other hand, are less likely to consider any possibility that might arise in the course of the relationship, for instance, man preparedness in case a child is sired during a relationship is very minimal.
The emotional expression also differs in both genders. Contrary to the stereotype that men are emotionless, it is vital to understand that men also have emotions ( Bergner, 2013) ; however, they exhibit restrictive emotionality as a trait, this is whereby they tend to keep their feelings to themselves, most men choose not to publicly share their feelings with their peers or partners, as such, they suffer internally. It is essential to understand that this restrictive nature in men is toxic and interferes with men's mental state. On the other hand, women show emotions vividly; this is why it is elementary to read a woman's feelings without asking them what they feel, they also tend to share out their feelings with their peers or partners.
In conclusion, it is evident that, indeed, sexuality differs between men and men. Judging from their sexual orientation, men are generally more active than women; men also understand their sexual orientation more than women, that is a man is either heterosexual or homosexual, while a woman is bisexual, it only depends with where they will get their sexual satisfaction. As discussed, men's sexual urge increases day by day regardless of their age, as such, they will always go the extra mile to satisfy themselves, women, on the other hand, reach an age where their sexual desire decreases, but that does not mean they cannot engage in any sexual activity, to them, sex only becomes less appealing, thus, not a priority. Men also hide their emotions, unlike women; they prefer not to share what they feel with others; for instance, it is tough to tell when a man is angry, sad, or happy. Women are emotionally weak; hence, they cannot hold back what they feel, especially when annoyed or when depressed; they are also more likely to share their feeling when happy.
References
Cohen, L. J., & Recorded Books, Inc. (2016). The Handy Psychology Answer Book . Canton, MI: Visible Ink.
Symons, D., & EBSCOhost. (1981). The Evolution of Human Sexuality . New. Incorporated.
Bergner, D. (2013). What do women want?: Adventures in the science of female desire .
Wiederman, M. W. (2001). Understanding sexuality research . Wadsworth.
Buss, D. M. (2010). Why women have sex - understanding sexual motivation from adventure to reve .
