‘Grief is the price we pay for love’ is a quote by Queen Elizabeth that explains the adverse encounter every human being experience during the course of a lifetime. The human psychology is designed to experience different feelings and emotions based on their encounters. Grief is a description of the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that occur when a person is dealing with loss. This could be the loss of a loved one, a pet, broken relationship, or even property. Any form of loss may interfere with the normal functioning of a person, depending on their stages of life and ability to handle the process. Linda Rodebaugh, a nursing professor and her colleagues explain that there are four major stages of grief. They state that the stages include reeling, feelings, dealing, and healing. On the other hand, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross a well-known psychiatrist outlined five stages of grief in her book ‘On Death and Dying’ published in 1969. Kubler-Ross explains that the main stages of the grief process are denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. This research document will elucidate the grief process across an individual’s lifespan, the four components of grief and the Elisabeth Kubler-Ross five stages of grief.
Differences in Dying and the Bereavement Process across the Lifespan
Children, adolescents, and adults grief differently, mainly because of their emotional and physical maturity levels. For instance, children between the ages of 3 and 5 years are egocentric and they believe that the world revolves around them (American Counseling Association, 2016) . The death of a loved one may cause them to believe they are responsible because of their self-focus. Furthermore, children between the age of 6 and 12 years learn the basic skills of life, but they tend to be greatly attached to their cultural values. Just like the younger ones, they also blame themselves for the loss, and may want to behave differently, with the hope that their behaviors and actions will bring the loved ones back. At this age, grief crisis may interfere with age appropriate activities, forcing one to address problems beyond their psychological level.
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Teenagers or adolescents between 13 and 18 years tend to feel guilty for the death or loss of their parent(s). At this age, they struggle with identity and self-esteem. They want to differentiate with their parents. Unlike the younger children, adolescents tend to express the loss and grief through acting out behavior and body language. On the other hand, young adults between the ages of 20 and 40 may blame themselves for the death or loss of a loved one. The experience is also long lasting and very powerful for them. They may also isolate themselves and change social connections. At this age, losing a loved one means grief and assuming their responsibilities (American Counseling Association, 2016) .
Middle aged adults (40-60 years) tend to feel guilty and may be impacted financially, socially, and psychologically. They also assume responsibilities. On the other hand, the elderly adults above the age of 60 years have acquired properties, cognition, memories, and various experiences that help them handle loss better (American Counseling Association, 2016) . However, they are still adversely affected and they may feel dependent on others more than before. In every stage above, adverse emotions such as guilt, anger, anxiety, and sadness are common.
The Four-Component Model
The first component of grief is reeling or context of loss. A sudden loss may leave one stunned and in disbelief. Reeling may reappear even after a person has come to terms with the loss of a loved one (Ritchie, 2018) . Young adults between 20 and 40 years old tend to be in denial for a longer period and may find it hard to display any emotions at this stage. The second stage is the continuation of meaning of the subject associated with the loss. This is where a person displays and experiences powerful feelings that occur as they negotiate their ability to come to terms with the loss. Moreover, the emotions appear simultaneously and may include guilt, deep sadness, helplessness, and anger. The feelings may also cause physical symptoms such as insomnia, lack of appetite, and headaches. Loss is a powerful experience for young adults and may lead to adverse problems such as depression and anxiety disorders for longer periods. In some cases, it may cause drug abuse (Ritchie, 2018) .
The third component is changing lost relationships representations over time. It is also known as dealing with the loss. It involves actions and thoughts that are likely to help adapt to the issue. It may include going through the clothes and personal belongings of the loved one. Also, one may seek help and plan their future at this stage, as a way of dealing with the situation. With the help of friends, family and professionals, young adults are more likely to deal with the situation easily. Lastly, the role of coping and emotion regulation processes or the healing process is the last stage. As a part of one’s life journey, they may integrate their loss through reengaging in their daily life in new or different ways. It also involves recovering from the anguish and sadness (Ritchie, 2018) . With support and social development, people between 20 and 40 years are more likely to heal faster and move on with their lives.
The Grieving Process
The grieving process of a young adult leaves one in shock for days and even weeks. At some point, it may be difficult to have feelings associated with loss because of denial. Additionally, it may be difficult listening to a conversation about the death of a loved one. However, after coming to terms with the loss and accepting the ordeal, it is easier to deal with the experience because friends and family play an important role at this age. With a social group that is supporting and understanding, it is easier to express the emotions accompanied with the experience such as sadness and anxiety. Luckily, it is easier to heal and move on with life as a young adult after dealing with the situation.
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’s five stages of dying
The psychiatrist Kubler-Ross states that a grief process is made up of five stages. The first is denial and isolation. At this phase, one denies the occurrence of the death of a loved and behaves as though nothing has happened. It is a temporal defense technique that is replaced with the awareness of pending businesses and financial considerations. The second stage is anger and resentment whereby the dying person or the bereaved wonders why they have/had to die. This can be projected to the caretakers, health practitioners, and family members (Kessler, 2017) . Thirdly, the dying person hopes for delayed or postponed death at the bargaining stage. They tend to negotiate with God for a more days to live. The fourth stage is depression, which is experienced after the person comes into terms with the fact that they will day. Moreover, the certainty of death makes them silent and they isolate themselves. Lastly, they develop a sense of peace and acceptance of their situation. At this stage, the emotional and physical pains are minor or very absent. According to Kubler-Ross, this is the final stage and the end of the dying struggle (Kessler, 2017) .
References
American Counseling Association. (2016). Grief Reactions Over the Life Span. American Counseling Association.
Kessler, D. (2017). The 5 Stages of Grief. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross five stages of grief . Retrieved from https://grief.com/the-five-stages-of-grief/
Ritchie, D. (2018). Loss, Grief and Representation: "Getting on with It". Art and Pain .
