Many people would argue that divorce only affects certain family members, particularly the parents, within the household. However, it is prudent to recognize that the effects of a divorce spill over to all members of a family. After the extended inquiry into divorce, studies have proven that children who experienced divorce when growing up acquire poor development traits. Some of these traits include poor learning habits and very high levels of behavior and emotional problems (Nixon & Swords, 2016). In today's society, divorce is becoming a more pressing issue in the lives of many, with its effects being felt in every sphere of the community. While both children and parents experience problems arising from divorce, it is the parents who experience extensive periods of traumatic stress. Some of the challenges affecting divorced parents include dealing with financial stress, loneliness and being separated from their children. Such issues are proliferating with every divorce, forcing more parents, children, relatives and the society at large deal with the myriads effects of altered household structures. Divorce can be an overwhelming situation for both children and parents. This is because divorce has tremendous effects on an entire family. Many families endure divorce throughout the year, not just in America but also all around the world. However, professionals believe that children encounter divorce differently than parents do. However, this does not mean that children are always the most affected. Conversely, every member of the family is affected emotionally or physically throughout the process of a divorce. While referring to the work of various scholars this, this paper will argue that divorce is an overwhelming occurrence for both children and parents and the entire family feels its effects.
Contrary to popular belief, both parents and children suffer greatly from the consequences of divorce. Children are affected throughout a divorce, both emotionally or physically. They are also more likely to experience depression due to the separation of their parents which can affect their grades in school along with their behaviors (Nixon & Swords, 2016; Weaver & Schofield, 2015). On the other hand, parents are affected by divorce differently. For instance, they may face the stress of financial challenges, and not knowing whether or not they will have enough money to provide for their family. This is especially the case if one of the partners lacks a stable source of income. Other issues that parents face are custody battles, the stress that comes with not knowing whether they will have time to visit their children or if they might end up not seeing them at all. In this regard, Weaver and Schofield (2015) established that children from divorced families portrayed more behavioral problems than their peers from stable families. As per their study, the evidence of behavioral problems on the children appears immediately after the divorce. During early and late stages of adolescence, the behavioral problems also manifest in the children. Their findings prove that the effects of divorce can stay longer in children. Previous studies on this area had argued that the consequences of divorce disappear within two years after the actual separation (Weaver & Schofield, 2015). Therefore, these results serve to provide fresh perspectives on the issue.
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On the other hand, the study confirmed that the children’s harmful habits were prevalent both at home and at school. Using reports from both mothers and teachers, Weaver & Schofield (2005) established that divorce led to an accelerated acquisition of negative habits. This can be supported by the fact that children are more likely to show external behavior problems after their parents separate. This is especially the case if their families have poor financial prospects. When a family had a sustainable financial background before the divorce, then the children are more likely to be buffered from the negative outcomes of the parents' separation. Another useful finding from the study is that the “mother's pre-divorce sensitivity buffered the overall effect of divorce on children's externalizing problems” (Weaver & Schofield, 2015). This also leads to the decreased externalizing problems related to the separation of the children. Though the effects are real, the previous relationship between the parents and their children can either increase or moderate the development of such behaviors (Weaver & Schofield, 2015).
Numerous scholars acknowledge that early life experiences are highly associated with adulthood behaviors, both psychologically and health wise. Also, one common effect of parental divorce during childhood may be the development of traits in a child that may last for a long time. In this respect, Larson and Halfon (2013) concluded that “parental divorce in childhood is associated with lowered well-being in adulthood and long-term survival.” The children that experience divorce during their childhood need to be put under early health promotional efforts so as to support positive health trajectories and their future well-being. These kinds of support systems may be achieved through proper parenting by the caregivers among other positive aspects of child development (Larson & Halfon, 2013).
Studies have also shown that even when children are living with a single parent, good parenting after the divorce can have positive effects on their behavior and overall development. Additionally, when the relationship between the mother and children is stable before the divorce, then prospects of having a rapid positive adjustment in them is high. Children intelligence level can cushion them from destructive effects of separation (Weaver & Schofield, 2015). A study done by Nixon and Swords (2016) sought to examine the impacts of single parenthood on children. The study approved the results of earlier studies by showing that children from divorced families display higher levels of social, emotional and behavioral problems in childhood. Likewise, they have poorer school grades, are more likely to drop out of school, be suspended or be expelled from school. Further, these children have more contact with the law and use illicit substances (Nixon & Swords, 2016).
The study also established that overwhelming differences in academic performance exist between children from stable families and those who are from separated families. For instance, up to 34 percent of the children from divorced families show declined educational and academic performance. Conversely, children from stable families consistently attained better grades compared to those of children from divorced families. Nixon & Swords (2016) concluded that the gap between the academic performance of children from separated and non-separated families grows bigger every day. It is prudent to acknowledge that a good family structure contributes significantly to the well-being and development of a child. When parents separate, it is highly likely that the children will be affected negatively. These adverse effects may be worsened by the family’s poor financial prospects and parenting style (Nixon & Swords, 2016).
When parents separate, they make their children prone to poverty, and lack of parental guidance and emotional support. Thus it is a fact that, when two parents’ guide a family, more resources are available to the children. “ To put it simply, two parents in a household have more resources, in terms of time, energy and money, to invest in their children than has one parent” (Nixon & Swords, 2016). The primary reason that children are affected negatively by divorce is the fact that they have fewer resources available to them. Poor financial prospects will undoubtedly affect children negatively. When there is a shortage of resources within a family, a collection of adverse outcomes will arise. These consequences affect the children’s “physical and mental health, language and cognitive development, academic achievement, and educational attainment” (Nixon & Swords, 2016).
Children living in a single parent family also miss the interpersonal bond that exists between the absent parent and child. This interpersonal bond is a resource and is crucial in the development of a child. The amount of contact time between kids and parents is a very significant aspect that cannot be ignored. In divorced families, children have no access to role models, and lack of proper disciplinary checks. This accelerates the rate of development of negative behavior. When a single parent lives with the children, he or she is likely to have very limited time to invest in them. On the other hand, these parents may also be pushed to work for longer hours so as to meet the financial needs of the family. This may increase the parents’ stress levels due to lack ample time to rest. In this regard, the negative impact of such parents cannot be overemphasized. Poor single parents show adverse psychological and emotional well-being because of experiencing extreme stress levels (Nixon & Swords, 2016). Quigley and Nixon (2016) agree that “the family environment represents a significant site for early learning and development.” A well-structured stable family is, therefore, imperative to the development of a child. The most important aspects of a child’s development are “literacy in the home, engaged parenting, reading and speaking to the child and having high expectations for the child” (Quigley & Nixon, 2016).
There is a consensus that parents who live separately with their children experience emotional stress and their wellbeing is influenced negatively. Joint physical custody fathers have a better relationship with their child. However, the fathers that lacked joint physical custody experienced more negative communication with their children. Spending more time with the child and taking up parental responsibilities on a daily basis seems to offer extensive opportunities for conflict resolution between fathers and their children (Sodermanset al., 2015). The negative communication between the father and the child arise from the unhealthy emotions of the father that stem from the divorce. In the modern society, caregiving, though now subtly changing is mostly associated with female parents. Therefore, it is challenging for the man to take up the role of parenting after the divorce (Sodermans et al., 2015).
Kalmijn (2013) agrees that children will develop strong bonds with their parents if both are living together as opposed to when only one parent is available. Likewise, Kalmijn concludes that marriage is essential to advancing biological relations (Kalmijn, 2013). In another study, Kalmijn (2014) examined the effects of parental divorce on the parent-child relationships. He concluded that divorced children have a higher possibility of living with their parents after the divorce than single-parent children. On the other hand, an examination of the contact existing between adult- single children and adult-divorced children to their old parents showed that the adult- single children have more frequent contact with their more elderly parents compared to the divorced children. This outcome illustrates how the effects of divorce can spread far and wide in a family (Kalmijn, 2014).
It is undeniable that divorce has long-term destructive effects on the family as a whole. Though some disagree, arguing that divorce affects parents alone, the studies cited in this work indicate a consensus that divorce has far reaching effects on an entire household. The effects extend to children, close relatives and at most the divorcees. Some effects of divorce, when not checked, can stay with their victim for the rest of his or her life. Moreover, various scholars have proven that children living with a single parent perform poorer than those who live with both parents. This is because living with a single parent robs a child the emotional support, guidance, disciplining and monitoring, which are central to the holistic growth of any person. With no access to such moral support, children live miserably and succumb to various ills, including drug abuse. Divorce, therefore, can destroy a child's prospects of progressing in life.
To parents, divorce causes unprecedented stress and emotional imbalance, hence affecting their overall well-being. The isolation experienced due to being separated from one's children breeds negative psychological conditions. It has also been established that single parents living with their children are likely to suffer from stress. By solely living with their children, it means that these parents have to work longer hours with no time to rest. It also means that they have to deal with myriad problems that may arise from the children, by themselves. In many instances, very little time is spared to bond with the children because of the financial stress that is likely to arise following a divorce. All these factors lead to poor behavior and declined academic performance of the children. Furthermore, the lack of support from a partner in parenting increases stress and the prospects of negative emotions.
In conclusion, this paper has proven that the effects of divorce affect the family as a whole. This is because it negatively impacts the children, parents as well as close relatives. Likewise, the children whose parents have separated experience many development-related problems. The most widespread problems are bad habits and poor academic performance. When children who have experienced divorce are not put under healthy reform systems early, they may experience poor psychological and other harmful health conditions in their adulthood. Early prevention of this is desirable so as to place them in good development trajectories. Since divorce is amongst the most common social challenges in our post-modern society, its effects are real and felt by the larger society. Therefore, there is a need to carry out more research so as to understand the effects of divorce better. Despite this, measures need to be put in place to reduce the rates of divorce globally. This is critical in fostering a healthy society.
References
Kalmijn, M. (2014, August). Children’s Divorce and Parent–Child Contact: A Within-Family Analysis of Older European Parents. The Journals of Gerontology: Series B, 71 (2), 332-343.
Kalmijn, M. (2013, October). Adult Children's Relationships With Married Parents, Divorced Parents, and Stepparents: Biology, Marriage, or Residence? Journal of Marriage and Family, 75 (5), 1181-1193.
Larson, K., & Halfon, N. (2013, February). Parental divorce and adult longevity. International Journal of Public Health, 58 (1), 89-97.
Nixon, E., & Swords, L. (2016). Is family structure a source of inequality in children lives? In cherishing all the children equally? Ireland 100 years on from the Easter Rising (pp. 58-77). Cork, Ireland: Economic and Social Research Institute, Oak Tree Press.
Quigley, J., & Nixon, E. (2016). Parental Investment & Child Development. Cherishing All the Children Equally?Ireland 100 years on from the EasterRising (pp. 80-101). Cork, Ireland: Economic and Social Research Institute, Oak Tree Press.
Sodermans, A. K., Botterman, S., Havermans, N., & Matthijs, K. (2015). Involved fathers, liberated mothers? Joint physical custody and the subjective well-being of divorced parents. Social Indicators Research, 122 (1), 257-277.
Weaver, J., & Schofield, T. (2015). Mediation and Moderation of Divorce Effects on Children’s Behavior Problems. Journal of Family Psychology .
